A strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure or hostility
Black women are angry (at least the ones who can see the forest for the tree). Hell many Black women (even the ones who pretend they don’t see the forest for the tree) are angry. The difference is, one chooses to play dumb, the other chooses to acknowledge the ugly truths.
Anger is not necessarily a *bad* thing unless it leads you to destructiveness or causing hurt or harm to others. But as an emotion, it’s natural and sometimes necessary in order to understand that some things are unhealthy and what causes you anger, should be removed from your life.
Black women are Angry because for so long we are awakening to the reality of our state of being as a *collective*. And we are angry at people and things that continue to keep us in this ugly collective state.
But where do we go from there? Anger can only stick around for so long before it starts manifesting as bitterness within your spirit and life. If anger is not quickly channeled into or towards a healthy next step, it can and will only destroy the person harboring it.
THE INDIVIDUAL LIFE & THE COLLECTIVE LIFE – AND THAT SLIPPERY SLOPE
Individually many Black women are doing just fine in our lives. We have jobs, we live in good communities, we are free and able to live and do as we please to make ourselves as individuals happy and fulfilled. We are surrounded by loving family and friends.
But there is that thing called the collective. And when you live in a society that works and plays in collective thinking, you have no choice to be affected because no one lives alone in a bubble or vacuum. You may wish not to play the *collective game* but at some point you will have to partake be it voluntarily or involuntarily.
Once a happy individual Black woman starts looking at the collective destruction of those like her and how this can and does seep into her individual life in various ways, she starts to look at what is causing this collective destruction of the group she has no choice to identify as in this world and society.
The first reaction is mostly ANGER. That is because when you are angry, something most likely matters to you in some way. Anger is an emotion. Emotions develop from feeling. A progressive Black women who *cares* becomes angry no matter how well of a life she may be living individually. She understands there are generations of Black women BEHIND HER, that will continue to go down that path of collective destruction, if something is not done to try and stop the bleeding.
Our ancestors in America during times of slavery and Jim Crowe, I am sure were ANGRY at some point in their existence in the face of overt racism and the lack of rights they had. What they did was channel that anger not towards the *culprits* of their current positions in society, but they channeled it with positive action steps towards getting out of that position into a better one so that the generations behind them (US TODAY) can live better than they did.
In this society you are forced to identify racially and culturally and by gender. PERIOD. That’s just the way it is. And because of that it’s in everyone’s best interest to protect their collective best interests irregardless of the individual life they have. WHY? Because that is the world and society we live in. If your collective is doing poorly, you, no matter how well your life is, will have some aspect of that affecting you.
THERE AINT NO CALVARY COMING TO SAVE YOU SISTA!
That’s usually the first acknowledgement that a well-informed progressive Black woman has to understand and accept. And that, can and does make some angry. Angry because when you have been out calvaring and saving others who have not returned the favor you feel jipped and depleted of your love, time, energy, resources.
But, we as Black women need to learn how to channel that anger away from the *CULPRITS* who are trying to keep us on the path of destruction, and channel towards action to carve a better path for the collective.
The obvious next step to dealing with anger directed and those who are mistreating you and trying to hold your head under water is to develop apathy.
lack of interest, enthusiasm, or concern.
MOVING FROM ANGER TO APATHY
Black women who are progressive thinkers clearly understand that something has to change in our behaviors, mindset and how we are currently navigating through society today. We also understand clearly there are *CULPRITS* who are working overtime to keep us in our collective places, so as they can continue to gain privilege off of our backs and energy and resources.
For decades Black women *CHOSE* to play second fiddle to everyone: our community, our issues as women, our health, Black men, media, and now the chickens have come to roost – FOR US.
The anger is actually as result of feeling abandoned, neglected and constantly being (as Alchemist so eloquently put it in the previous post) in the *metaphorical firing squad* of those who need a punching bag and seek Black women as just that.
But once you have stepped out of the matrix, swallowed the red jagged pill, let in marinate in your system a bit, and then pooped it out, and become clear on what and who is at play, you really are in a much better place. You are free. As they say “The truth will set you free!”. It’s true! Knowing (IMO) is MORE THAN HALF of the battle.
The next battle is learning to move from anger to apathy. Yes, even in the face of culprits antagonizing, demeaning, trolling and doing any and everything to keep you from pushing forward. You already understand the root of why they do this. And it’s because of their fear of no longer having that kung Fu grip and hold on your life and being as a person and a collective.
When you become apathetic, you no longer have emotions. No emotions means no more feeling. And when there is no more feeling, you cannot get angry nor hurt. You actually become in a neutral mind state that allows you to sit back and no longer have to waste your emotional or mental energy on things and people who have clearly shown they really don’t matter in the grand scheme of things. But another benefit of apathy is, it doesn’t cause you to react. And not reacting is a good thing, when trying to live well and you are being constantly bombarded with negativity by people and things trying to keep you and the collective on the path of destruction.
Something else also happens when you become apathetic – People eventually learn to leave you alone. WHY? Because they know YOU.DON’T.CARE. and that they are wasting *THEIR* time and energy which is garnering ZERO results that they needed to keep you in a state of emotional turmoil.
the fact or process of doing something, typically to achieve an aim
Once you have mastered the art of APATHY towards things, people and places that are seeking to keep you in emotional turmoil and on the path of destruction, you now have the tools to move into action.
Action towards a goal or aim without the right mindset is futile. If you are still stuck in ANGER mode any actions that you choose will be marinating in anger as its foundation. And when angry you cannot make the best choices. You need a clear head and mind and to be in the *RIGHT* emotional state.
Black women need to learn how to use the powerful force of APATHY to help them make better choices. Apathy to action enables just that because there is no more emotional ties to the culprits of destruction. They can tease, taunt, troll, and do and say all kinds of things to get you off track – but you are apathetic to them and able to continue on your journey to helping yourself and other Black women see the light.
Part of Living well for Black women in terms of ACTION means, simply not becoming emotionally involved anymore. THAT is an action. No longer participating in destructive things to your individual and to your collective. No longer explaining and trying to reason with idiots and haters who need you as their punching bag. No more disclaimers or explanations on why you deserve happiness and the best life for yourself and you collective’s right to seek their best interests collectively.
Good feelings remaining after a pleasurable or successful experience
Once you have successfully taken the right action steps to living well as a Black women, you will experience the AFTERGLOW. It’s like the climax has come and the orgasm has been released and now you are just basking in the beauty of it all.
I can always tell a Black woman who is in her afterglow. She is happy. She is like a butterfly floating along and has clearly figured it out. She stays neutral and cannot be pulled into the Black hole of destruction anymore. She has removed herself, her resources, her time and energy from the culprits of Black woman destruction. The Culprits of Black woman destruction don’t even bother with her anymore because the light emanating around her is protective gear from haters. They can’t touch her. The light is hot and burning and they just melt away if they come to close.
This is where Black women as a collective *CAN* be and reach that afterglow. But it doesn’t just come. It takes steps to get there.
If you are still in anger mode, you still have a few more steps to climb before you are really free. Understand that huge gap between Anger and the Afterglow means you have to let go emotionally by becoming apathetic, and you have to take positive actions steps to keep the haters away.
If we as BWE women want to reach the masses of Black women, we have to do it without ANGER. These women are already fighting against the truth. If they believe we are just ANGRY women who are scorned, it will be hard to convince them to join our ranks.
So think about the 4 A steps and what you need to do as a progressive Black woman to get to the afterglow. Once you’re there, others will want to follow suit.