You know what? I’m just going to lay it all out for yall.
I am not going to go into the history of colorism and the Black community and how it affects BW. I consider my site to be about progressiveness and progressiveness is NOT sitting around still talking about Black people’s nonsense when you are able and willing to remove yourself from that and step into the global arena where most people could care less if you are dark or “light skinnded”. It’s a dead horse that has been more than beaten to death, because Black people have not done much about it. All BW keep doing is saying “we gots ta talk bout this colorism thing”.
You know what? Talking aint getting yall any closer to loving yourselves and ridding yourselves of this colorism nonsense perpetuated by ignorant Black people. In fact, it’s just making you more bitter, more exhausting to deal with as women.
I believe many BW keep talking about colorism because they want those very same BM and people who make them feel inferior to suddenly come and ride in on their horses (you know that Calvary I keep telling yall that does not exist for BW????) and save and rescue them from their feelings of inferiority and suddenly tell them they are the most beautiful creatures alive and those light skinned women are the DEBIL! And then and only then will some of yall BW feel worthy and valuable and able to go on with your lives as ADULTS should.
But guess what? THAT AINT GONNA HAPPEN!
If you want rid yourself of this colorism nonsense – then DO IT. Understand BW and people have been TALKING about it for centuries and guess what – it’s still here! You want to actually DO SOMETHING? Stop the crying, the documentaries, the round table discussions and actually do something for yourself that will help you LOVE yourself and stop seeking validation from a community that has and NEVER WILL give it to you!
Now yall are looking for NON BM to save and rescue you.
GUESS WHAT? That aint gonna happen either! Wanna know why? Cause Non BM have waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too many options in women to be trying to save a bunch of women whose issues stem from Black men’s preferences.
I am going to talk about this colorism nonsense and its current seeping into the IR community with BW who are bringing their issues, insecurities and colorism nonsense into this arena.
I am going to talk about how ONCE AGAIN BW make themselves look like the most difficult group of women to love and live with.
I’m just going to be very BLUNT in this post and tell you what will happen, how yall look and why many of you will never meet a quality man of ANY RACE. And if you have managed to snag a quality Non BM before he could see your issues – God help him and the children you sire with him who will look like the very women and people you resent.
HERE IS THE REALITY WITH BLACK WOMEN AND IR DATING (according to NEECY)
First of all. American BW are a very small percentage of the female population. In relation to men who want to get married, date and get laid, BW do not AFFECT their abilities to do such one way or another. And by the looks of it, this includes high quality BM.
IOW’s if all of American BW fell off the face of the earth in the next 20 minutes, NON Back men (and HIGH QUALITY BM) would still be able to get married, date casually and still get ample amount of sex from women. The only real group who would be affected are NON QUALITY BM who cannot attract women of other races.
THIS MEANS – in a NUTSHELL – BW in the IR dating arena are expendable.
This means. That men do NOT have to deal with a bunch of nonsense, insecurities (that they did not create) from women who will not make or break their dating, marriage or sex lives.
This means that as a BW you need to be very well put together mentally, emotionally and physically if you want to attract, obtain and KEEP a quality male in your life.
This means, that if you are a BW looking for *QUALITY* Non BM (and even BM) *WITH OPTIONS* that you are competing with ALL other races of women who are much more easily obtainable to these men as they are constantly in these men’s inner circles in one way or another.
THIS MEANS – that no quality WM or Non BM wants to deal with your issues about colorism that stem from Black people’s nonsense.
THIS MEANS – that Non BM do not want to spend their lives and times rescuing you from your own feelings of inferiority (created by Black people’s nonsense), when they can date women without these issues.
This means, no quality male wants to raise his children in an environment where the mother might possibly carry on her insecurities (from Black people’s NONSESEN) and project and transfer those onto their and his future children.
MEN who are of quality and with options want to live and love women who make it easy for them to do that. Do you know how DIFFICULT and EXHAUSTING it is trying to love a person that doesn’t love themselves?
Do you know how difficult and exhausting it is trying to save a person that truly can never be saved because they want continuous sympathy and have no interest in doing what it takes to HEAL THEMSELVES and learn to love themselves and understand they are valuable and worthy?
Do you know how exhausting it is, trying to convince someone they are beautiful when they do not believe it deep down?
Do you know how exhausting it is constantly having to listen to a grown ass woman talk about what she went through as a child because of her dark skin, how ugly she feels compared to light skinned women, and continually repeat and talk about this while doing NOTHING to heal herself?
ITS FRICKEN EXHAUSTING!
No grown QUALITY man *WITH OPTIONS* wants to save an insecure woman.
No grown QUALITY man *with options* wants his kids raised and reared by an insecure woman who feels inferior. She *WILL* transfer that onto her kids and it will have an effect on her kids one way or another.
No grown man with options wants to spend more of his time *TRYING* to love you and live with you & CONVINCE YOU he *really likes you with no ulterior motives* while you are still talking about Black people’s nonsense!
If you want to keep harping on colorism perpetuated and PRACTCED by BM, then STAY WITH BM and try fixing BM! Do not bring your colorism nonsense in the IR dating arena, making it much more difficult for BW to be seen as SANE adult women worthy of being loved for a lifetime by quality men, crying over this NONSENSE perpetuated by Black people.
WM CATCHING FLACK FOR DATING LIGHT/MIXED LOOKING BW
You know what? Yall need to take a damn seat!
BW are in no position to be telling a Non BM what kind of BW he should and shouldn’t be dating. UHM – check the stats sweetie pies! Go back up and READ the reality that Non BM do not have to take orders from BW on who they should date because THEY WILL CONTINUE TO DATE, MARRY AND HAVE SEX WITH OR WITHOUT BW.
So instead of bringing your tired colorism nonsense to the IR community where you have NO REAL CLOUT with the men you are seeking (in terms of making demands), stay in and with BM and the Black people’s nonsense you love to wallow win.
You have NO RIGHT questioning who and what a NON BM chooses as his partner when it comes to dating Black women. Non BM like everybody damn else on this earth have a right to choose mates based on whatever it is they want to choose it on.
MOST NON BLACK (WHITE) men could give a RATS ASS about how light or dark a BW is. Its yall insecure tired BW who are projecting your nonsense onto them about skin color! A WM may choose a light skinned mixed BW one day and the next day may date a woman the color of Alek Wek. WHY? CAUSE THEY CAN!
Please for the LOVE OF GOD, do not project your colorism nonsense onto MEN who do not have those issues to begin with.
To most Non BM – a Black woman is a Black woman whether she is light, dark and even MIXED.
I am beyond TIRED of these bitter self-loathing Black women brining Black people’s nonsense into the IR where IT DOES NOT BELONG.
PUT YOURSELF IN THE SHOES OF A NON BM WHO MAY BE THINKING ABOUT DATING YOU
Imagine you are some strapping high quality Non BM who has his pick of the litter. Imagine this man one day says it doesn’t matter to him the race of the woman as long as she is mentally and emotionally sound, good looking, in good shape and will make a good parent to their children. Imagine you are a WM who may have to deal with some pushback from friends and family, but still decides to keep an open mind and date a BW.
Imagine going onto IR sites where there are scores of BW who are “SO CALLED” interested in dating Non Black men.
Imagine reading post after post and comment after comment talking about how BLACK MEN MADE YOU FEEL BAD ABOUT BEING DARK SKINNED, HOW DO NOT FEEL NOT BEAUTIFUL because of your dark skin because of BLACK MEN.
Imagine reading words upon words of “Black men hate dark skinned BW and pedestalize light skinned women” “dark skinned BW are always the last choice of BM” “I’m tired of light skinned BW always being seen as most beautiful” “I could care less how light skinned BW feel because I as a dark skinned BW was told I was ugly and unworthy all my life by BLACK MEN”
Imagine what would be going through this man’s head reading this on sites where BW are “SUPPOSEDLY” interested in dating Non BM.
Imagine this Wm thinking “oh God what will my kids go through dating women like this? Will she hate her own light skinned and mixed kids? Will she resent them and make their lives hell? Does she really still want to be with BM, but because they don’t want her, she is just trying to find anyone who will date her? ” Hmmm. Maybe I should just stick with Asian and White women – it’s just easier”
If I were such a WM? Pssh I would RUN for the hills and never look back. I mean seriously. WM and Non BM CAN afford to do this and still have a love life of some sort with or without BW!
Non BM did not perpetuate (directly) colorism onto BW today. So why the hell are you still harping on an issue on sites where NON BM are interested in seeking BW REGARDLESS OF SKIN SHADE?
Most healthy sane men like beautiful women and could care less if she is light with green eyes or dark skinned with big brown eyes.
So to question a Non Bm’s dating choice of a BW is SICK because you are projecting BM’s preferences and your insecurities onto HIM when he most likely does not have it. And if he does that’s his darn business because truth be told, if a WM didn’t want to date a woman of color HE DOESN’T HAVE TO! He can still find a Non BW of any ethnicity to settle down with and live happily ever after and not deal with this nonsense that so many BW are bringing into the IR dating arena.
So have a seat!
I’ll tell you why many of You SO CALLED PRO IR BW keep doing it! Cause as I said earlier YOU STILL WANT VLAIDATION FROM BLACK MEN. PERIOD. You want them to tell you, you are worthy and beautiful so you can go on with your lives and feel valuable and PRETTY.
WELL – GOOD LUCK!
SOME BW OF *ALL SHADES* JUST WANT PEACE! ENOUGH ALREADY WITH YOUR COLORISM NONSENSE!
But please, until you figure it out, STOP bringing this mess into an arena where HEALTHY MINDED BW of all shades are trying to FOR ONCE get away from the nonsense that they have been induated with in terms of Black people and colorism.
Some BW just want freakin PEACE already. And now they cannot even find it in the one area where they should be able to find it, because there are still so many BITTER, inferior minded BW bringing and carrying over their colorism Black people’s nonsense.
I truly feel for the dark skinned BW who are always silenced by the ones who REFUSE to heal themselves. I have had plenty of dark skinned BW in my life who simply do not even give this nonsense a thought. They are too busy living life, loving themselves and seeking out people who will love them for who they are and understand they are worthy and valuable as women.
If you are an adult – YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE for how you choose to think of yourself and live your life. NO ONE ELSE! This world and people today have no interest in saving other adults when they have their own damn problems.
And remember this: MEN do not want to be with difficult to live with and love women. The only men who choose that route are men without options and who are of lower quality.
So if you want a man without options and who is low caliber – keep up your colorism nonsense. Because most likely this man will deal with it because he has no other choice.
But if you are a BW who wants a man of quality, stature, and options, I IMPLOIRE you to do what you need to do to heal yourself, because no man of QUALITY and *WITH OPTIONS* will stick around and deal with your insecurities. He may have sex with you, but in terms of a long term relationship – he will run for the hills.
HOW YOU GONNA RAISE MIXED AND LIGHT KIDS WHEN DEEP DOWN YOU STILL HAVE UNRESOLVED ISUES ABOUT SKIN COLOR?
And my other question to all these so called “PRO IR” BW who are bringing your colorism nonsense into the IR (where it does not belong) – HOW THE HELL are you going to raise healthy light and mixed daughters (from Non BM that you claim to be seeking) when you still seem to have some resentment towards them???
This is a LEGIT real question that i would like an answer to.
Some of yall need to stay your behinds in the Black community and with BM – cause YALL AINT READY no matter how much you tell yourselves you are. All you want to do is transfer and bring your nonsense over to other men.
Well i am not going to sit quietly while you try to ruin the reputations of healthy minded BW of ALL SHADES who are trying to get away from the very nonsense you keep BRINGING into these communities.
In the famous words of Elenor Roosevelt ~ “NO ONE can make you feel inferioir without YOUR CONSENT”
Some of yall need to seriously read and understand that quote and PRACTICE IT.