HA! R. Kelly whining about low records sales

And trying to guilt trip BLACK FOLKS into supporting his crap.

 

 

http://www.clutchmagonline.com/2015/12/r-kelly-really-wants-black-folks-to-buy-his-album/

 

Something tells me to not get too excited at the thought of black folks no longer supporting this rapist and pedophile. But homies record sales are apparently so bad, he has to put out a call to “BLACK PEOPLE” to support one another HIM???

 

LMAO that is what you call some NERVE! Although he should not have even been on any awards show, it looks like that didn’t even help his measly 28k records sold since he dropped his album.

Then he has the AUD DASSSSS  ITTY to say something  like “if people don’t see blacks supporting and RESPECTING each other we will never get that from other”.

 

😳 REALLY? Was you thinking about that all those years you used black folks undying support to turn a blind eye to,your pedophilia of our young girls?

 

This is fool doesn’t even realize the reason his ass isn’t sitting behind bars with a sex offender charge is BECAUSE OF THE UNDYING SUPPORT black FOLKS give to Negroes like him!

 

God I hope this is due to more BW waking up. I actually deleted 3 people from my friends list on Facebook for writing supportive crap about him and then telling haters to “eat it” (yes one person on my friends list had a hash tag after the soul train awards #rkellyhaterseatit! Another person kept liking his page and new album. I deleted them too. All BW.

Here is the link of him literally pleading and begging blacks to,support his rapist and Pedo ass.

 

TO BAD SO SAD Rapist Kelly!

If you see a void, don’t beg others to fill it for you – FILL IT YOURSELF! (Instagram rant)

Ok so I have an instagram account in which I follow quite a few make-up artists and professional models INSTAGRAM models (lol). What are Instagram models vs. professional models? Instagram models are Instagram made and paid, and professional models are… It’s like reality stars vs. A list stars. LOL But I’m a sucker for beauty and fashion so I follow.

Being into make-up, I have been very interested in all the new techniques and such used. So I follow women of various races (including Black) just to see the new trends and new make-up etc.

If you are not familiar with Instagram or how it works,  pretty much you can follow people based on interests. Mine is make up and beauty.  There are quite a number of popular and up and coming make-up artists who are sponsored by make-up companies and such to hawk their make-up products to their instagram followers (like myself) so that people like me will go out and buy the products. The more instagram followers a MUA has the more companies will sponsor them and send them freebies.

 

So naturally everyone and their momma are always posting pics and videos of their make-up techniques/skills to get noticed and gain many followers so they can get paid by companies and sponsored by companies to get free products and things to market on their Instagram pages.

 

Some of the MUA (make-up artists) I follow have varying  numbers of instagram followers. Some have them in the millions and others fall beneath that.

 

Well what happens is, the more popular Instagam MUA pages, tend to get the most traffic. So what these owners of the accounts do is not only post their make-up products/ skills/techniques, but they also will post the same of some of the smaller less known but talented MUAs on instagram to give them some shine and to help them gain followers.

 

Honestly, a lot of the Black MUA I follow I found them through the Non-Black women’s pages if I didn’t find them on my own.

 

Here is where I am going with the post.

 

STOP BEGGING FOILKS TO DO FOR YOU WHAT YOU CAN DO YOUR DAMNSELF!

So naturally Non Black MUA’s who have high number of followers are most likely being followed more by women who look like them (non-Black) than minorities. Naturally they are going to use models and make up COLORS mainly for those with Non-Black features and skin.

 

When it comes to technique IMO race doesn’t matter because it’s just technique. However, when it comes to applying certain formulas and colors that is where seeing someone with your own skin tone etc., helps.

 

So I expect to see these techniques and such from Black MUA’s when I want to learn how to say CONTOUR and what the best products are to use for darker skin tones vs. White ones.

 

There is a gay BM make-up artist I followed for a minute (I stopped following him though because I cannot deal with begging Black folks).

 

He has a low number of followers compared to some of the other Black MUA’s (like 43K) and certainly the Non-black ones.  Even the Black women MUA’s with low numbers are doing the most and putting content out there regularly to keep gaining an audience.

I feel  he could have waaay more followers and such if he spent less time posting memes and short vids of him flinging his wig around and batting his *GORGEOUS * green eyes in the camera (the boy has got some amazing green eyes like I have never seen before). ANYWAY……. He IMO should be more time posting pics and vids of the various models of various races he works on. He does some professional work on some well-known models, so he should be able to be one of the top MUA’s on Instagram.

 

BUT like I said, compared to the Non-Black MUA’s and the other Black women MUA’s he spends more time posting meme’s while they are hustling and making new videos and pics of new make-up techniques on the DAILY. Sometimes even more than once a day. They are pretty much hustling because they want their fan base to grow. In order to do this, you need to be always posting pics and vids for your followers.

 

His ass posts pics and vids every once in a blue moon. I haven’t seen one make up video from him. Just still pics every now and then. But I still followed him just to support.

 

Well the other day I was scrolling down and came across a MEME he had. It said “Darker skin tones matter too” or something to that effect (BTW he was not talking about race, but skin tones of all women of color from light tan to dark). And beneath it he had copied in the top 3 make up gurus on Instagram that have millions of followers. I know these make up gurus because I follow them. And frankly, that is how I ended up following him, because one of the non Black MUA’s posted some work he did.

Also on is bio page he has a little paragraph going on about how Black beauty and dark beauty matters to and how the make up industry …..you know the same old same old complaining and expecting others to do for us what we can do for ourselves. I am simply no longer moved by these declarations of BEGGING from Black folks.

Anyway,  So then he wrote his commentary beneath the meme which basically was talking about how more of these popular MUA’s need to show more diversity in skin tones on their pages because everyone is not just White skinned. He was complaining saying that they use White models and will put dark make up on them instead of finding models with naturally darker skin tones.

 

Is this common across the board? YESSS. Ok we know this so why are we still begging them to include us people? Moving on…….

So yeah maybe they can post more pics of darker skin models of varying races. But they still do IMO post pics of dark skinned models and MUA’s just not nearly as much as White or Non-Black ones. Which makes sense to me if their fan base mostly consists of Non-black women with whiter skin tones.

 

Additionally, when they do  post that rare  pic or vid from a Black MUA or model, its up to Black or darker skin tone women to click their pages where they will most likely find other MUA’s and models of the same type. Its like a domino effect. You click and go to one page and you will find similar pages of what you want based on the current page you are on. So these Black MUA artists should be tagging other Black MUA’s so they can get more followers – WHICH MANY OF THEM DO. That is how people get followers. One MUA tags another and vice versa. They promote and help each other.

 

I have yet to see his ass doing any of this.

 

Also, because I understand the concept of self-preservation and most normal groups will always put themselves FIRST. So why would I be mad or have an expectation that they would have scores of darker skin tones models when they are not dark themselves and their followers aren’t?  All they need to do is post the occasional Black MUA or model for me and I can take it from there and click on their pages to get to other Black MUA and models. HELLO!

 

*ok I got off track. Back to his commentary and meme*

 

Of course tons of his Black female followers came running in there  co-signing etc. One BW was like “yeah I was just ranting about this on such and such’s page about why she never features any Black or darker skinned models! Hardly ever do you come across a darker model on her page!”

 

*WAAA WAAA WAAAA!!!!!*

 

So I’m like – you are a make-up artist. You are black (although he claims he wasn’t talking about race but skin tones) why can’t you use your own page to do just that – feature more dark skin toned models and MUA’s on your page and fill that void that you aren’t getting from the Non-Black popular MUAs’. But no one wants to hear that. Its always about us BEGGING OTHERS to take care of us, to do for us, to MAKE US.

 

Why can’t black folks get it through their thick skulls that no one owes you anything and they damn sure aint just going to hand every damn thing to us on a platter because we WHINE, PISS AND MOAN about what they aren’t doing for us!?

 

HOW ABOUT DO THE SHIT FOR YOURSELF AND STOP ACTING LIKE HELPLESS CHILDREN!

 

Jesus! How hard is it for you as a TALENTED Black MUA with some connections, to use your page to feature more women you feel are lacking on the pages of other MUA’s? Instead of posting pics of your eyes, lips and wigs or memes, he should be spending more time doing what he feel is lacking on Instagram in terms of darker models and MUAs!

 

Why is it Non-black women MUA job to have a slew of dark skin tones models when they are probably getting paid and sponsored off of the number of Non-darker followers they have – not to mention they are NOT DARK themselves!

 

OMG! Seriously. But no one wanted to hear this.

Help me understand yall? Why is it that Black people are not self-sufficient and cannot create and do for self like every other group. Why is this very talented MUA begging for someone else to do the work he should be doing? And he has a lot of nerve especially when he doesn’t even post as many pics and vids compared to all the other hustling MUA’s on Instagram. Yet he wants them to do the heavy lifting and feature dark skin tones models on their pages and feature him and other MUA’s on their pages so they can get more followers.

 

DO IT YOUR DAMN SELF! How about that!?

 

I stopped following his ass because I cannot deal with begging Black folks who refuse to do the work it takes to fill the voids they fill are missing.

 

We have to stop the begging like helpless kids and start creating OUR OWN.

 

Ok, I’m done ranting. Other than that, I can say the other Black MUAs on there are working hard to secure followers and sponsors. If I want to find techniques, colors and such to use, I click on their pages. If I just want to see general techniques, I view all of their pages. its real simple. All he has to do is actually WORK and hustle like everyone else.

 

I have to say that the other BW MUA’s never complain though. Never seen any complaining posts from them as they are smart if they want to secure mainstream sponsors. They are being SMART…

CALLING A SPADE A SPADE – so called PRO IR BW and their textbook COGNITIVE DISSONANCE

Cognitive Dissonance:

  • The state of having inconsistent thoughts, beliefs, or attitudes as relating to behavioral decisions and attitude change

Examples:

  • “To hell with the Black community and its dysfunctional crap! I’m moving on to greener pastures and opening myself up to other races of men and HEADIN FO THE NORTH STAR. If BW dark skinned BW wanna save themselves and have a chance at healthy relationships and families then we better start recognizing that non-Black men are the key. Stop wasting your time and energy on Black men who don’t appreciate you and your dark skin. ” 

*5 seconds later*

  • “Look at all these watered down Black women BM keep slobbering over! UGH. I’m so sick of the colorism and dysfunction in the Black community. These women aint real sisters. Black men hate themselves and they just keep trying to erase “REAL” Black women by trying to pass of their watered down bi racial and light women as Black. That’s why I’m moving on from these self-hating Negroes!” 
  • *10 seconds later”

 

  • *5 seconds later*

 

  • UGH! Why are all these bi racial women always trying to COP what we have and then get recognition for it!. These bi racial women trying to erase us and always getting SHINE for wearing our hair styles and looks? Oh look at this chick again with her faux locks stealing BW’s beauty! Why has this bi racial chick gotten a doll for wearing faux locks? Aint a regular non ambiguous BW in sight! NEVER in their stories, movies, pic, songs etc. They are trying to erase us! These BM hate themselves so bad that all they want is these Non Black watered down bi racial looking BW. That’s why I have moved on and encourage other sisters to do the same.”

 

  • *10 seconds later*

 

  • BI RACIAL WOMEN AINT BLACK and they don’t represent me! I am sick of these women ERASING me as a Black woman. Stop letting these women steal your throne as a Black woman! That is why I have moved onto non Black men who can better appreciate a real BW. Do not let these bi racial and light skinned BW steal your throne! I am sick of them always stealing our shine as Black women. THEY AINT BLACK!”
  • 5 seconds
  • “Yeah I know I will have a bi racial child if I marry a Non BM – AND??”
  • 2 sec later
  • “Black men have been erasing BW since the beginning of time. Racially pure BW need to start standing up and stop letting light and bi racial women erase us!”

 

  • 2 seconds later
  • “Yeah I know I will have a bi racial child if I marry a non BM – AND?????”

 

This nonsense is exhausting for me as a BW, imagine what it must look like to some unsuspecting Non BM who might be open to dating BW.

 

Can you imagine the shit that would go through his head about our sanity?

 

I really want you to think critically about what I’m saying. Don’t just read the words but really critically think about what I am about to write here.

 

My first instruction: DO NOT BE A TEXTBOOK CASE OF COGNITIVE DISSONANCE that so many Pro IR BW are.

 

These women are borderline cray. They are clearly not well and not in any position to have any kind of healthy relationship with ANYONE.

 

Are they crazy for wanting to uplift themselves and create some sort of boundaries? No. Bu its seeped in hate and bitterness is the problem.  You can uplift yourself and beauty without always harping on others.

It goes back to my post about the sales representative who has a GREAT product. If your product is THAT GREAT you won’t ever need to bash the competition. You will not go into a sales meeting berating your competitor to get what you want. You will only be successful by focusing on YOUR AMAZING PRODUCTS qualities without the bashing.

If your competitor has a 90% share of the market, you will not win people over by being bitter and hateful about the fact that your product is only used 10% of the time. if you want to grow your market share, you do it by pointing out the great qualities of your product and not spending time and energy bitching about the competitor with a 90% market share over you.

 

SAME THING! Black women are not going to win any likes from outsiders by bashing the competition who has a greater share over us in terms of beauty ideals and love. That is just the way TIT TIS and many of these BW are not MATURE enough to handle that in a graceful manner.

 

 

And their views are  also problematic because you cannot be so PRO BLACK WOMAN and then turn around and date/marry and have the very children you have issues with. I keep hammering this point home because I do not think these BW have the wherewithal to really see and dissect their beliefs and how problematic they are to their goals of achieving relationship “bliss” with non Black men.

 

On one hand they want to hold onto this idea of PURE Blackness and but still date and marry and pro create with Non BM. They want to  *CLAIM* they are done with BM, but every turn they are talking about what BM like; they are  still meddling in Black community dysfunction, BUT CLAIMING to have MOVED ONTO GREENER PASTURES in the global community.

 

They want Non Black men, but not the offspring that comes from Non Black men (or rather have serious issues with the types of offspring from these unions). They claim they are done with BM, but can’t keep BM and BM’s preferences out of their mouths.

 

They can’t stand Bi racial women (or feel bi racial women are an obstacle in terms of black beauty), but are aware that’s who they will be pushing out if they date and marry across the color lines. They claim to be progressive, but still talking about old tired shit that has been around in the BC for centuries. I could go on.

 

These women are trouble makers and they are going to bring those negative things from the Black community into their IRs (if any man in his right mind decides to even pursue their crazy behinds). And they are sucking in other young impressionable BW in the process.

 

If these were PRO Black love, Pro Black KANG Black women saying and doing this, I wouldn’t bat an eye because it would make sense to me that they would do this. But when I see and hear so called pro IR talking like this, I see some serious PROBLEMS ahead.

 

This is why I am telling you –  GET YOUR MIND RIGHT before you even THINK about crossing any lines to date ANYONE. The Black women who are thriving and living healthy and happy lives with their Non Black partners and children are not sitting around blabbering about the BS that these so called PRO IR Black women are. They are not creating divides based on skin shade. WHY? Cause they dun GOT THEIRS!

 

They are not sitting around day in and day out bitching about BM’s preferences, whose black and who aint black enough, one drop rules and all that other stupid shit that NO ONE expect crazy dysfunctional baggage ridden Black people care about!

 

If you truly are ready to date IR, you will understand that you will have to somehow, someway find a happy medium where you can still love and embrace yourself as a BW and also be able to raise HEALTHY well-adjusted bi racial children (girls especially). I am dead serious.

 

Many of these baggage ridden BW are selfish and can’t seem to see the forest for the trees. They feel no choice other than to date IR, but they also don’t like the idea of the offspring from these unions because they see them as an OBSTACLE to their Black womanhood.

 

Unless they have no plans of pro creating, these women are going to take these issues and dump them onto their unsuspecting POOR non-Black partners and bi racial kids. MARK.MY.WORDS.

 

Just because you think you are ready for something, doesn’t mean YOU ARE. There are a Bunch of BW who need to find a stadium and have sev-er-alllll seats before they even think about dating anyone.

 

These women are DAMAGED and ANGRY. They think the fix to that is dating across the color lines, YET they aint even ready to deal with the animosity they have for the very women and children they will be creating with their non-Black partners.

 

 

BE CAREFUL AND CRITICAL OF WHO YOU LISTEN TO

 

That may very well be me for some of you. If it is, no love lost. I have never gone into something with the intentions of being FAKE or TRY HARD to garner brownie points, high-fives and pats on the head. I have and am a very COMPLEX person with varying degrees of viewpoints. I’m the kind of person that if things are going awry in my life, the FIRST person I look to is MYSELF and I try to dissect the areas and things that I have done to contribute to where I am at in my life. And I also hold others to that standard.

 

But I also realize that, that way of thinking doesn’t translate to most people , because most people like to be victims and never hold themselves accountable for their thoughts and actions that *MAY* be contributing to the issues in their lives.

 

It’s very easy to be a victim. It takes a lot of heart to look at yourself and START with SELF when it comes to dealing with the not so great things in your life.

 

It takes A LOT to say “I have issues and I need to work on them because I truly want to be happy and attract like for myself”.

 

I don’t do this for money (at least not yet) nor do I do it because I need everyone to love and like me and my views. This blog is my place of sanctuary to get things off my chest that *I* want to let out.

 

That’s just how I roll. I call a spade a spade even when the shit is uncomfortable and puts me in a position of being side eyed by those who aint ready to hear some UNCOMFORTABLE TROOFS.

 

I’m not, never have and NEVER WILL be everyone’s cup o tea and I am OTAY with that. Neecy is going to say her peace and point be it popular or not.

 

YOU’RE STARTING WITH A CLEAN CANVAS AND SLATE – DO NOT LET ANYONE DUMP THEIR CRAP ON IT

 

If you are a young DARK SKINNED UNAMBIGUOUS BW excited about opening yourself up to men of other races, then you have made the first step to freedom as a BW. I don’t need to go into detail of why. You already know.

 

But here is something that you may not *REALIZE*.  The moment you decided to give yourself a chance at being loved, appreciated, and given the chance at healthy relationships that revolve around your individuality and NOT some “standard” of beauty that you do not nor will ever fit, you have started with a CLEAN SLATE. The minute you said “I’m so done with the Black community and black men and its lack of value it has for BW like myself and others who look like me” AND MEANT IT – you have given yourself a clean slate.

 

Once you decide to walk away from the MATRIX and break the chains YOU HAVE GIVEN YOURSELF A CLEAN SLATE.

 

Do not muddy and mess up your clean canvas by internalizing the toxic dysfunction of other BW who claim to be on that same path. Listen to what they are saying and watch what they are doing. Are they really on that path for reasons they say or are they BW who are going down that path out of “necessity” and not true desire?

 

Why do you start with a clean slate when you TRULY desire to remove yourself from dysfunctional Black people’s nonsense? Because in the global arena, most men of other races see Black as Black. You don’t have to bleach your skin or turn yourself into a pretzel to fit an ideal. You are already BLACK and they have already come to terms with that and that alone.

 

You can try to argue with me on this, but that is just the REALITY and FACTS.  In this country the one drop rule has been so imbedded in the psyches of everyone that most people would agree today that anyone with any kind of Black aesthetic is BLACK. This may very well change in the future BUT FOR NOW, this is what it is, whether you like it or not.

 

What this means for you as a dark skinned unambiguous Black woman is crossing the color lines, is you are not up against competing with light, bi racial Black women for non-Black men based on SKIN SHADE, ADMIXTURES, HAIR TEXTURES etc. YES! You are on EQUAL footing in the interracial arena with Black women who in the Black community are seen superior based on skin tone, hair texture and admixture.

 

JUST TRSUT ME ON THIS! LOL I don’t have WM who post here but maybe one – his name is Mike. In my last post on this topic he confirmed what I said in regards to this.

 

I have been on this earth 40 something years. TRUST ME when I tell you that most Non ethnic Non BM could give a rat’s ass Black women’s admixtures or lack thereof when choosing to date us. They see us all the same – as BLACK. That includes “Blackish” looking bi racial women. If they are brown skinned with Black aesthetic THEY ARE BI RACIAL but they will be viewed and perceived as BLACK.

 

And if a NON Black man doesn’t want to date a BLACK WOMAN, he will not date ANY BLACK WOMAN no matter if she is mixed and “blackish looking”, light skinned or dark. He will not make exceptions for even MIXED or half Black women because in THIS SOCIETY TODAY anyone who looks Black IS BLACK to them.

 

NOW. We all know this is not the same playing field for BW of varying shades in the Black community. We all know that dark skinned unambiguous BW are virtually HATED by their own men to the point they are often the unfortunate beneficiaries of internal colorism (i.e racism) in the Black community. We all know that this can create  self-esteem issues with dark BW and even ANIMOSTY towards those Black women who they feel are getting that love based on superficial things that cannot be changed.

 

Animosity is a NATURAL emotion to feel when you are constantly berated and compared to others and made to feel not up to “snuff” based on something you cannot change (your skin color, features). Especially when the people doing the damage LOOK JUST LIKE YOU!

 

So I am acknowledging that animosity is real and NATURAL because we are human beings!

 

But there comes a point when you CLAIM to let go and move on, that you do just that. Because festering animosity that isn’t dealt with in a healthy manner will make you bitter, toxic and baggage ridden.

 

AND that leads me to my next point….

 

BEWARE OF TOXIC, BITTER, ANGRY BLACK WOMEN WHO ARE TRYING TO ENTER THE IR

 

Every year more and more BW are awakening to the dysfunctions of the black community and the dysfunctional unhealthy relationships most BW find themselves in in regards to Black men. More and more BW are speaking up and out. And these BW are now feeling safe to say they are going to cross the color lines and open themselves up to other races of men.

 

GRRRREAT.

 

Here is what is not so GRRREAT and what you need to be very careful of in terms of what you are internalizing.

 

*SOME* of These BW are ANGRY, FRSUTRATED, and BITTER. *SOME* of These BW have not dealt with their animosity towards light and bi racial BW. *some* of these BW have not gotten the MEMO that it aint that type of party in the IR dating arena (men having preferences based on who is more mixed looking etc). These BW see them (bi racial/light women) as the enemy because their minds are STILL STUCK ON BLACK COMMUNITY NONSENSE. These BW are still held imprisoned by BLACK MEN’S PREFERENCES and they create forums and such to get other BW aboard their bitter express trains LEADING TO NO FUCKING WHERE.

 

I’m telling you right now, if you truly want to meet, mate and have a healthy solid interracial relationship paring with a quality man of another race –STAY AWAY FROM THESE TOXIC HATEFUL AND BITTER BW!

 

These women *SAY* and claim they are ready to move onto greener pastures. Yet their blogs, posts, pages are filled with TOXIC rhetoric that goes back to the black communities dysfunctional colorism nonsense.

 

Instead of these women seeing the forest, they still stuck on the colorism tree. They cannot seem to understand that in the IR global arena, there are different rules. And those rules have very little to do (for BW) with skin shade, admixtures etc. like they do with Black men.

 

Some of these BW are on a hell path because they “wanna stick it to these light/bi racial women” who have “stole their throne”. LOL. You can be that chick if you want to. And you will be that chick who will be bypassed by quality Non Black men who cannot afford to have that kind of silly nonsense in his life or around his future children.

 

Look around at the BW who are in IR’s. When you see them happy, smiling and being care free, these are the BW who have truly LET GO. They don’t feel competition from light, bi racial women because they knew they were starting with a clean SLATE when they decided to expand their dating pool. They know the man that is on their arm is with them because he loves and appreciates HER in her skin as she is.

 

They don’t need to sit on forums, blogs and Facebook ranting and raving and foaming at the mouth about who aint black and who really is and who is wearing faux dreadlocks and who is erasing folks, who BM are obsessing over, yada yada.

 

Think about it. Look around you. Ask yourself. Are the truly care free happy butterflies of BW who are happily BAE’D up arguing over this nonsense? Are they even bothered by it? By the looks of them happy, smiling and being loved and adored – I’d wager no.

 

Do you think these truly happy and loved and cherished BW have time to nit-pick who is black and who aint really black and all that other nonsense?

 

Do you think these women are fully aware that if they cross the color lines and have children they will be bi racial? And these bi racial kids of their DESERVE  and will need every bit of LOVE, ADMIRATION and REINFORCEMENT from their Black mothers and that, if there is any kind of issues in regards to bi racial that would be a difficult task to do if those issues are not dealt with in a healthy manner?

 

 

Here’s the reality. There are A LOT of angry, hurt and damaged Black women out there. These BW have found a new outlet to try to “escape” but they can’t really seem to escape. Because when you have baggage that you do not deal with in a healthy manner, you will drag it to every.single.place you go.  And you will also collect others with that same baggage. And what you are left with is a big clusterfuck of damaged baggage ridden women trying to convince themselves and everyone else they are and have moved on to greener pastures when really they are still stuck knee deep . in MANUER.

 

DO NOT BE THAT BLACK WOMAN. Stay care-free, drama-free and happy. TRAVEL, LIVE ABROAD. Get away from these crazies in the USA (lol).  You will attract people to you who love and adore you for who you are. You will not have to worry about colorism and feeling less than if you choose your friends, mates and circles wisely.

 

I am not saying Neecy’s Nest is the place for you. It may very well not be and my views may not be for you as well. I am saying be careful and critical about what you are participating in as a BW even if it’s MY BLOG), because there is a lot to get caught up in. If you want to be care free and happy go out and live your life and do not get caught up in the BS.

 

Stay away from troublemaking divisive  HATEFUL Black women.  They don’t truly seem to understand how to gain allies. The only thing they are competing against is each other to  see who can spew the most bitter rhetoric and get the most high-fives from it.

 

DO NOT BE THAT BLACK WOMAN. I do not care how hurt you feel, unappreciated. Seek some kind of help and ways to deal with those feelings  IN HEALTHY WAYS before you venture into any relationship.

 

The bricks just keep dropping! This is what happens when you gladly cape and take on the roles of men

THEY DON’T SEE YOU AS WOMEN and DO NOT WANT YOU AROUND!

Courtesies, Concessions, Considerations given to other women are null and void for YOU!

lately I have been reading a lot of reports on how Black women are being denied entry to various clubs, parties and venues across the globe.

Clearly, this is racism and SEXISM rearing its ugly head, but my spidey senses are telling me that its just YET another way BW are paying the price for gladly accepting and taking on the roles of men over the years.  Now in the psyche of many, we are so masculine they do not want us around in social venues and setting where men are looking for women to mingle and party with.

All that marching, fighting DA WHITE MAN for the “helpless endangered species BLACK KANG” and never raising your daughters to learn what it means to be women so that you can receive the same “courtesies, concessions, considerations” as all other women – YEAH we’re paying for that shit HEAVILY NOW.

This is also what happens when Black women refuse to acknowledge they have it a lot worse than the Black men they have been caping for all these decades. Black women are not only experiencing RACISM but we have to deal with the SEXISM that follows that. That good ole DOUBLE WHAMMY.

Instead of making sure we focus on that and stop acting as if BM are the only Black folks who are suffering under racism, we have chosen to remain silent, ignore raising generations of Black girls who relish in their femininity and womanhood, and now, men in clubs and at parties and social venues don’t want us there.

I believe deep in their psyche Black women represent masculinity. And I believe that has come from YEARS UPON YEARS of Black women not focusing on developing our womanhood and proudly and publically taking on the roles of men.

Guess who gets the shit end of the stick again? JOO GOT-TEET!

BLACK WOMEN.

Guess who is a participant in Excluding you from these venues? JOO GOT-TEET!

Black men!

For your reading DISpleasure:

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/brit-woman-claim-club-refused-entry-black-article-1.2418680

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/what-went-down-the-night-4-black-women-were-denied-entry-at-a-uk-nightclub_560c0035e4b076812700098f

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/grade-point/wp/2015/11/02/students-accuse-yale-sae-fraternity-brothers-of-having-a-white-girls-only-policy-at-their-party/

But she was surprised by this: “A group of girls came up who were predominantly black and Hispanic,” she said. “He held his hand up to their faces and said, ‘No, we’re only looking for white girls.’ … He pulled a blond girl up from the bottom of the stairs — over some people — pushed her inside and said, ‘We are looking for white girls only, white girls only.’ No brothers corrected him or said anything.”

It was uncomfortable, he said, in part because that brother is African American and others working the door at the time are Portuguese and Costa Rican; he described the chapter as racially diverse. He said some in Yale’s black community have called black SAE members “Uncle Tom” on Monday, making them feel like they are being forced to choose between siding with the fraternity or others of their race.

TIME FOR ACTION

Hopefully you’ve read my post below.

I’m tired yall. Its time for action for our young Black girls. And I’m willing to take it. I am also willing to dedicate my complete time to this but I am not going to do it without help. YES that means leave my job and dedicate myself full time to fighting for the rights for our young girls. YES I will and can be the “Al Sharpton for BW” because honestly someone needs to lead the cause because BW and girls are under serious attack and NO ONE is standing up for us.

People pick on those who they feel have no back up or voice.

One of the ways in which I have been thinking about starting this.

I had visited a site called INFO WARS. Its run by a White man named Alex Jones. And while I really have no interest in many of his topics, I like his type of platform. I like the fact that he has created his own newsroom and platform for tackling issues HE cares about.

Another platform I was looking at was Glenn Beck. He has started his own Tv online network. Of course I have no interest in his topics or even causes, just how they have built their platforms to address issues that concern them.

If there is ANYONE out there interested in trying to start such a platform, let me know now. If not I will still proceed myself. But I will at that point ask for subscriptions and donations to help the site and network along. Not now, but later down the line.

This has been on my mind and in my heart FOR YEARS. I kept putting it off. I’m also not getting any younger and I’m finding as each day, year passes I get anxious because I haven’t done ANYTHING. I believe God put this in my heart and as my calling. He keeps speaking to me and I’m ready.

I am taking ideas for names of the network as well as it will STRICTLY focus on addressing the issues affecting African American girls and women.

Just visit those sites to get an idea of the type of platform I am talking about and then let me know your thoughts.

Infowars.com – Alex Jones

The Blaze – Glenn Beck

Also, any other ideas that you can think of in terms of ACTION and the steps let me know. I’m open and will consider them all.

It’s time. I’m ready and willing!

Is it time for a BW Mass migration out of this fucking place?

I think its time.

http://www.cnn.com/2015/10/27/us/south-carolina-school-arrest-video/index.html

 Its clear our young girls and as women we are going to stay under attack by everyone.

BW once again, there is no calvary!

The justifications for our abuse by EVERYONE.

The Black male teacher and students who sat by and did nothing as they watched this young girl be thrown around like a peace of trash.

YES it was a BLACK MALE TEACHER who called the cops on tis Black girl, and stood and watched unmoved as she was thrown around and slammed for CHEWING GUM.

The only other person who stood up for her was another BLACK GIRL who was subsequently arrested as well for doing just that and videotaping the incident.

What I saw was a young girl sitting at her desk doing nothing and who was completely slammed in her chair and dragged across the floor like some ragdoll.

While Black women are in fighting with each other about colorism, real shit is happening in this society to our young Black girls. You know shit that actually shows how Black women of any and all shades are under attack BY EVERYONE.

 

While Black women are fighting on the lines for Black men against all kinds of shit including police brutality, Black male teachers are calling the cops on young Black female students who are chewing gum in class and sitting quietly at their desks and standing by watching as they get dragged and body slammed to the ground by racist White cops.

 

Black women you better wake up and realize who your real enemies are – IT AINT LIGHT SKINNED BLACK WOMEN!

 

Is it time for American Black women to start migrating to other countries outside the US like immigrants seeking better lives?

 

Yeah yeah the grass aint always greener, however, America has clearly shown it truly does not value the womanhood and femaleness of our Black young girls and maybe its high time Black women start a mass migration out of this fucking place, where they may have better chances.

Here’s just some more REMINDERS of what our young Black girls are dealing with in the public school system across this country.

Like I said contiunue fighting over thrones based on skin shade and for the love of men who don’t give a fuck about you.

http://www.citylab.com/work/2015/04/black-girls-matter-and-schools-are-letting-them-down/390726/

http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2013/10/black-boys-have-an-easier-time-fitting-in-at-suburban-schools-than-black-girls/280657/

I.JUST.CANNOT with this colorism BS!

I.JUST.CANNOT with this colorism BS!

I’m going to be cursing in this post so prepare yourselves. I have been marinating for MONTHS on this colorism stuff being brought to the forefront and trying to figure out where I stand. I tried not saying anything and making sure my thoughts are really not an emotional reaction. But they aren’t. I’m TIRED and have to speak MY MIND on this issue – and it will not be a popular or well received opinion, but nonetheless it’s MY opinion and I feel it needs to be said.

So basically this is my take on the colorism issue being constantly rehashed by BW.

This divisiveness isn’t going to get BW anywhere.

Sorry but yall aint ready! Many of you need to stay your behind right in the Black community and fuss and fight with light skinned women and Black men until you get your way. But please for the love of GOD keep your colorism baggage out of the global society and interracial relationships! Because at this rate, this is where it will follow you!

And the only people who will suffer are your potential UNSUSPECTING NON Black BEAUS and your mixed LIGHT SKINNED CHILDREN (Daughters especially). Please do not burden them with your UNRESOLVED colorism issues. PLEASE. The global world is the last safest place for SANE BW of any shade to go when they wanna escape Black folks pathologies and stupidity surrounding colorism.

Blacks girls of any shade raised OUTSIDE of Black people’s communities have healthier images and self-esteem of themselves than the ones growing up around Black people who continue to fuss and fight and create division over colorism.

I fear for so many bi racial and mixed light girls who will come from the wombs of bitter and angry BW who have not let go of their colorism baggage and moved on.

THE PLAYING FIELD NEEDS TO BE LEVELED

I have always felt that the colorism issue could easily be fixed by Black women making sure that the playing field gets leveled. Acknowledging the colorism against dark skinned BW, and MAKING SURE that anything we support always has a positive and beautiful image of a dark skinned BW. If it lacks that, and seeks to only present light/bi racial women, then that is a problem and we should NOT SUPPORT IT.

This could be done by withdrawing any and all support from things and entities that seek to create a division based on skin shade or that seeks to put down dark skinned BW beneath others. That demanding that you will only support and recognize things, people and entities that give dark skinned BW a fair shake and stop acting as if there is only one form of Black beauty which revolves around mixed and/or light women. I’ve always been down for that cause skin shade doesn’t define beauty. Only a damn fool could say something as SIMPLE as a skin shade determines a woman’s beauty.

In that vein, BW can win because we can TRULY and honestly then say BW come in all shades and various forms of beauty without it always DIS-INCLUDING darker more authentic looking BW.

If Black women were SMART this is what we’d be doing.

Its REAL DAMN SIMPLE! It could be accomplished and done if BW were serious.

BUT NAW!………..

Instead, yall want to stick it to the yellow and bi racial sisters and tell us to “STEP ASIDE” while you gain your throne as dark skinned BW! LOL Oh now you want us to step aside? But before, yall criticized us for running away from our blackness if we DARE celebrated or were thought to be trying to benefit off our “lightness”.

Now yall want us to STEP ASIDE, after all the centuries and decades we fought side by side with you and dealt with all the bullshit that comes with being a Black woman and half Black woman in this world?

Bi raical Black women were raped, enslaved and forced to deal with the same issues that came with having ONE DROP of Black blood. Of course they had some privledge over dark skinned BW, but when it all came down, they too suffered under the same umbrella as BW when it came to racism and sexism.

Also any accomplishments MADE by light and bi racial women went under accomplishments for BLACK WOMEN in general – NOT light or bi racial women. And still does to this day.

I still see your average half Black bi racial woman being put under the same umbrella and challenges that come with being Black.

Now yall want us to STEP ASIDE after we have contributed to the greatness that African Americans accomplished since day one?

Now yall want us to STEP ASIDE simply because you are tired of BM not worshiping your authentic beauty?

Now yall want BI RACIAL WOMEN TO step aside after all the fucking centuries of being told they were BLACK and any of them that tried to claim otherwise got scolded and crucified by THE SOUL PATROL for “running away from their blackness”?

WHAT IS IT!? Make up your damn minds! You can’t keep trying to make light and bi racial women play two sides of the fence! Either we are Black or we are NOT. And if we are not, then don’t say a damn word when they (bi racial) and light skinned BW start taking advantage of that in the global society and celebrating the very things that make us “not so Black”.

LIGHT SKIN WILL ALWAYS BE CELEBRATED IN A SOCIETY DOMINATED UNDER THE RULE OF LIGHT SKINNED PEOPLES – I.E. WHITES

Because the reality of it all whether you like it or not is this: The Black man never HAS held enough power, clout or infrastructure to make his image the epitome of beauty and success. When he had the chance to do it, he squandered it.

It has always been MALES who have placed the authentic women of their race as the STANDARD. NOT WOMEN. Its not WHITE WOMEN who place themselves on a pedestal – its their MEN who have.

So Black men instead of doing such has chosen to take the easy route and go after the STANDARD created by OTHER RACES OF MEN who hold power, clout, and infrastructure worldwide.

The women who come from these men REPRESENT that power, clout and success that comes with being of a lighter shade (representing those in power who are White). So in essence, colorism is ROOTED in Black male validation because in any race its men who validate the beauty of their women. When you do not have that, the women will become angry and bitter towards those who they feel are getting that validation but not really deserving of it. In this case its Lighter skinned and sometimes bi racial women.

Here’s the tricky part. Light and bi racial women are not trying to STEAL your thrones or erase you. Light and bi racial women have had NO CHOICE (up until fairly recently) to claim anything other THAN BLACK because that is the bucket the POWERS THAT BE and who rule the roost PUT US IN! And it’s the BUCKET the SOUL PATROL made sure we stayed in when we tried to move out of it.

So it’s not light skinned BW and bi racial women trying to come and steal your beauty thrones! It’s a symptom of a larger issue that roots itself in White supremacy and the celebration and upliftment of those closest to the WHITE IDEAL.

And this celebration of all things light, bright and damn near white will ALWYS exist as long as WHITE PEOPLE ARE IN CONTROL.

You see where I am going?

IS SEPARATION BASED ON SKIN SHADE THE ANSWER?

Cause the way in which some of yall are carrying on, its inevitable!

At this rate from what I am reading, the only way for peace and harmony amongst BW is for s separation. It’s clear to me that light skinned BW and bi racial women are no longer REQUIRED by “authentic” Black women to “call themselves Black” and we should just GET TO GETTING so you can “reclaim” your throne?

MKAY! You want that? Fine so be it. Just understand that once this happens you cannot see saw and try to make us claim our blackness while telling us we are not BLACK ENOUGH.

So many BW claim to be about progress and moving on. Do you know what that means? Can you see the forest? NO? Cause you still focusing on the raggedy ass trees that aint feeding you or giving you life!

Yall better figure it out because the world is turning and real shit is happening to BW OF ALL SHADES while yall infighting about light skinned women needing to step aside and let dark women get their throne.

While you guys are fighting to be recognized as beauties by Black men and people and trying to claim some type of “pedestal” based on color, Black girls are dealing with a slew of issues in this society that are only contributing to the constant downfall of young Black women.

Last I checked these issues were not separated based on who were LIGHT SKINNDED and DARK SKINNDED – it’s about BLACK WOMEN. You know Black women who are deemed Black in this society if they have 2 Black parents or bi racial women who are called Black if they look close enough to a BW? Black women who no one in the larger society CARES is the color of Beyonce or the color of Viola Davis?

n Rampant incarceration
n Being suspended and expelled from school at higher rates than ANY GROUP (including black boys) http://www.citylab.com/work/2015/04/black-girls-matter-and-schools-are-letting-them-down/390726/
n Making less on the dollar than any other group
n Being murdered at the hands of lover, b/f, and spouses more than any other group
n Growing rates of HIV and other STDs more than any other group
n Being one of the most unprotected classes in the world

The list goes on!

And all you guys can do is talk about how you need to reclaim your throne and get you dues for your authentic beauty and how light skinned BW need to “Step aside” and sit down with our “PRIVLEDGED SELVES”?

WHAT PRIVLEDGE? Oh:
n Being the love interests in rap and r& b videos
n Being arm candy for self-hating Black males who aint really making moves in the grand scheme of things
n Being worshiped by stupid ass BM who are failures in life
n Being in rap videos
n Being the first choice of thugs, athletes and rappers
n Being called pretty by loser Black men
n Being the love interests in R&B vids

THAT PRIVLEDGE? You want it? Yall dark skinned sisters can have it! I aint about fighting over crumbs!

When yall wanna start talking REAL PRIVLEDGE – you know that shit that can affect your livelihood, education and ability to just fucking enjoy and live life then holla at me.

Real privilege to where light skinned women are the only BW who can get good job, get educations over dark skinned BW, travel, live wherever they want. PSSSH!

Yall don’t know what real privilege is cause if you did this would be a MUTE point in the argument of colorism and light skinned women.

Privilege to yall is getting put on a pedestal by BLACK MEN. And while I don’t think that is unreasonable at all and very natural, the point is –THEY AINT AND NEVER HAVE PUT YALL ON A PEDESTAL so it’s time to MOVE THEE FOCK ON and stop with this craziness that only makes us look like Petty women.

As long as I and other BW of a lighter shade are dealing with the same damn issues and problems and things that come with being a BW – You can go to hell because I am not stepping aside or DOWN so that you can feel you’ve won some battle with Black men.

Dark skinned BW’s beef is with the BLACK MALE. Not women who cannot help how they were born or how BM perceive them!

I am truly convinced BW will not progress very much even though yall claim to be all about that.

Cause BW who are about progressing and never minding the BS, would not continue to create a divide based on some silly shit as skin shade that Black people and Black people ONLY care about.

THE REAL ISSUE IS THE FIGHT FOR BLACK MALE VALIDATION

Yeah yeah I know many of yall say you don’t care about BM and we shouldn’t have these discussions with Black men as the focus. REALLY? Cause every discussion about colorism and dark and light skin always mentions how light women benefit from being love interests, and placed on a beauty pedestal by BLACK MALES. So what is it? The real root of the frustration lies in the fact that dark skinned BW are pissed that BM do not honor the beauty of the “authentic” BW who look like them.

That BM honor the beauty that is furthest away from Black. If BM did this (honored and cherished authentic looking BW) we would NOT be having this discussion. So let’s be honest about why we as BW continue to talk about colorism – because darker skinned BW feel as if they are underappreciated by BLACK MEN who place light/mixed and non-Black aesthetics at the top of THEIR PEDESTAL. And you are tired of it and want to reclaim your beauty.

That’s FINE! But taking your frustrations out on light skinned BW and telling light skinned BW to “step down” aint going to get you to the promise land AT ALL. Because light skinned BW are BLACK TOO. And unless and until we decide that a separation is in order, we still have a right to be celebrated as such.

SKIN SHADES OF BW DON’T MEAN A DMAN THING IN LARGER GLOBAL SOCIETY WHERE SHIT COUNTS THE MOST

PROOF? OBAMA!

Just take one look at how disrespected our Bi racial half White president is, and that should be a VERY BIG CLUE that no one in the larger world is giving privileges to light skinned bi racial Blacks! Obama to everyone is a BLACK Man who in their eyes is not fit to be president. A lot of the criticism Obama faces is simply because many Non Blacks cannot and will never give full credit to a man of Black heritage running this world and doing a better job at it than a traditional White male.

All that privilege he gets being a light skinned BI RACIAL – YEAH RIGHT. His own wife doesn’t get any damn respect. So I’m sorry again SPLAIN to me how light and bi racial are getting more privilege than Dark Blacks?

Another thing, the argument that other races don’t let their bi racials the standard is a false argument. Simply because the REALITY is, they don’t claim them as White or such because THEY DO NOT LOOK ANYTHING CLOSE TO IT most of the time! No, no brown skinned curly haired brown eyed bi racial girl can pass for White. It’s a lot easier for a half Black child to be called Black because typically they have more BLACK features than the non Black part of them. You better believe if they could pass them off as anything but Black THEY WOULD.

I have seen that when bi racials look more like their NON Black side, they are EMBRACED as such and not made to feel they have to call themselves Black. I have been living amongst and growing up around enough bi racials to know.

I have a bi racial niece who will never be made to call herself Black because she does not look it. But she damn sure would be more likely mistaken for MY daughter than her own mother who is White. No one would ever question if she were mine if we were out. But they question her mother all the time if “she is hers”. On the other hand I know bi racials who look like light skinned Blacks folks and they are called Black because they LOOK IT.

Let’s stop acting OBTUSE as to why it’s a lot easier for bi racials to call themselves Black vs. the other way around. That’s because Black genes typically DOMINATE!

You’re prolly asking “why she caping for bi racials?”

UH cause I’m trying to get you to see that if you call yourself “crossing the color lines” the very CHILDREN you will be having will be just that – BI RACIAL. And any resentments and issues you have with them means you arse should probably stay pro creating with full blooded BM and not ruining your children because of your deep seated issues with bi racial women who will BE YOUR OFFSPRING if you call yourself opening up to other races of men!

And do not tell me you can fight against colorism and still love and embrace your bi racial daughters. BS! I read many of the comments coming from so called PROGRESSIVE PRO SWIRLING BW and I am saddened that these women cannot see how damaged they are and bitter and how that will CARRY into their relationships with Non BM and be pushed off inadvertatley to their bi racial and light daughters.

You will not be able with a STRAIGHT FACE to give your bi racial and light daughters words of encouragement, if you feel that the women who look like them are KEEPIN YOU DOWN!

INSTEAD OF WAITING TO EXHALE, YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN INHALING BRAD AND NEM

If dark skinned BW were really about seeking a throne, then they would have been making a bee line for the exit of the Black community and into the arms and communities of people who could care less if a BW is the shade of Beyonce or Viola Davis. Because most non Blacks do not separate Blacks based on their shade – hell most bi racial do not even get that benefit UNLESS they really look more White.

BUT as I said, dark skinned BW still want go down fighting for the Black man’s validation and taking your light skinned sister down is just one way many of you feel you can WIN.

Well I’m here to tell you, you won’t win that way. Because all it will do is cause a complete separation where those women who can benefit off moving as far away from their Blackness as possible WILL DO SO and no longer have to worry about the SOUL PATROL calling them out. Cause that’s what yall wanted right? To no longer be erased by light women?

THE ZENDAYA BS – DAMNED IF THEY DO AND DAMNED IF THYE DON’T

I am so sick of BW crying about Zendaya this and that! Women of all races steal each other’s looks. Black women get celebrated for stealing the looks of European women. They are deemed more beautiful. Wearing European wigs, weaves, contacts and such is STEALING White women’s beauty. But it’s a problem when someone else steals our uniqueness?

Beyonce KEEPS a blonde straight wig on her head! I have yet to see White women crying about her trying to erase them or steal their beauty.

Zendaya put fake locs in her hair and had a nasty racist remark made to her by a White woman who could care less that she was HALF WHITE. Do you honestly think Zendaya and the likes sits and says “how can I erase the beauty of BW? HMMM. Oh yeah let me put in some locks so I can erase the beauty of BW!”. NO! She put the locs in her hair because SHE WANTED TO because she felt it was a nice looking style for that event. PERIOD.

Just like a young dark skinned Black girl may sit down and slap a blonde weave on her head and some green contact lenses. Is she trying to erase the beauty of White women? Or is she just feeling that look for that specific time and chose to sport it?

And when she wore the style she experienced a racist comment that STUNG because it went directly to her for having an ethnic hairstyle. As a result she fought back (feeling upset because she is half Black), and got a doll with some locs. Yall having all kinds of conniptions when almost all Black dolls have Whitish textured hair and such. When Black female celebs imitate and straighten their hair and wear hair colors and weaves that are not of a natural Black state.

I am so sick of BW bitching about silly shit that doesn’t matter. NO ONE IS DELIBERTALEY TRYING TO STEAL OR ERASE YOUR BLACKNESS!

Most people are trying to be as close to White as possible. And the loudest voices of criticisms always come from Black folks. Now people trying to celebrate unique things found on BW and yall Bitching about that.

DAMEND IF THEY DO AND DAMNED IF THEY Don’t!

Like all things, other women are free to wear styles and things that are traditionally Blacks, just like BW are free to wear styles that are traditionally found on other races of women naturally.

JESUS there are bigger fish to fry than arguing over this nonsense.

Bi racial women celebrate Black women’s uniqueness by wearing it Black women feel slighted and erased. They run away from anything Black looking and try to embrace more European ideals, Black women call them SELF HATING.

WHAT IS IT? WHAT DO YALL WANT?

Like I said, I’m leaning more and more towards separation because the damage is just too deep for BW to come together and nip this shit in the bud the RIGHT WAY without infighting with each other.

If this is the case, I will have to rethink my platform and question why I would stand by women who do not see me as a sister but as a PROBLEM to them getting on some sort of pedestal and throne. Never mind the real shit all BW deal with on the regular that really shows that our lives are no different regardless of shade. You want to keep focusing on the petty shit that doesn’t mean anything in the grand scheme of things.

I.JUST.CANNOT………..

Here we go: Colorism, Black women, and the never ending light vs. dark battle

im responding to a recent post made by Breukeln Bleu. She is someone who I absolutely respect for her true words in trying to get Black women to see the light in so many ways.

but where we split hairs is her recent take on Colorism and dark skinned vs. light skinned. I understand that of course I have a different take because I’m not what one would (at least in black folks eyes) be considered dark skinned.

as tall know I say what I feel despite whether it’s popular. And I plan on making a post on how,I feel about HOW black women should go about addressing Colorism, and how if it can’t be addressed thatway, the only other option is for dark skinned BW to separate from light BW and each group create their own beauty ideals.

im getting so sick of this petty Colorism shit between BW which is ROOTED in Black male validation! PERIOD. Black men for the most part for CENTURIES have always been more I tersted in women who look furthest from them. No amount of BW dark vs. light in fighting will change the overall preferences that BM have had for DECADES.

im also going to point out how there ain’t no REAL PRIVLEDGE IN BEING A LIGHT SKINNED BW!

ull post once I et home from work.

Black woman Strategy #0958497549759847552837: UNDERSTANDING & WORKING IN THE GRAY AREAS

The “GRAY AREA” IS THE NEW “BLACK” for BW

 

As hard as it may be, many times I work and move in the gray areas because I know that is really what is going to move me 10 steps ahead of everyone else’s double standards, FAKERY, Lying, broken promises or trying to f*ck me over and get over or treat me a certain way based on being Black and a Woman .

 

 

Would I like to work in the Black/White and objective all the time? Of course who wouldn’t? its face value, it direct and its tangible, its “set in stone, it’s clear and concrete. You can touch it, feel it, see it and be comfy in it.

 

 

The gray area and the subjective isn’t always so easy to move about if you refuse to see what you are up against. And believe everything is always working from a FAIR & BALANCED standpoint.

 

 

Don’t get me wrong, you need to also be able to move in the Black and White areas. But the problem is BW have not equipped themselves to be able to deal in the gray areas and are often left CONFROOOSED when certain crap hits the fan and we were unprepared or unaware of how and why it happened.

 

 

The gray area is ambiguous and abstract. It’s harder to ponder and accept – especially when you believe things are or should always be FAIR and balanced and should garner the same results across the board.

 

 

It is painful to know and believe that because of the color of your skin and gender, you MAY very well be treated differently than another woman of a different shade DESPITE the “rules” saying that we are “all equal” with the same rights. The concept is true in a sense, but it’s not always applied. And how do you act in situations that you know the concept is not and will not be applied for you be it wrong or right?

 

 

All men in every race and culture TEND to and SHOULD protect and honor their women. You see the men in your race don’t do that – do you keep believing in the face value and RULES of how it should be, or do you look at the GRAY area and understand that not all rules will apply to everyone for whatever reasons, and you have to adjust yourself accordingly?

 

But we don’t have time for that PAIN & crying anymore because its reality. Strategy says a BW who understands the gray area, will always be 10 steps ahead so that she doesn’t end up 6 feet under or under someone’s 10 inch boots.

 

So we find ways to work around the Black and White and make sure we are covering our tracks in the gray areas. It’s the GRAY areas, the UNSPOKEN that are the BW’s friend and savior.

 

BW w/ EYES WIDE SHUT = Mental, Emotional and Physical STRIFE & SUFFERING

 

BW w/ INTUTION, INCLINATION, & INSTINCT = Mental, Emotional & Physical AWARENESS & SUCCESS

 

Your GUT is the Grey Area. And in many cases it can also be the LOGIC in how to act or move in a certain situation. Just because something is at face value, doesn’t always mean it’s LOGICAL.

 

I’m a firm believer in GUT and instinct. I have instinct and intuition like a MOFO. And I’m pretty sure I aint the only sister with it. When my gut and intuition speaks to me it’s NEVER WRONG. When my GUT tells me to do something and I do it, I win in whatever situation I am in.

 

There is a reason why they say in testing if you do not know the answer or are unsure of the correct choice, the first answer you choose is usually the correct one. Often times when you don’t go with your gut, you will make the wrong choice. THIS is proven in testing. I remember always being told this throughout school.

 

So my whole point is, If something doesn’t *FEEL RIGHT* or seem right to you, it PROLLY ISN’T! And your God given intuition speaks to you through your gut and will tell you this – *IF* you are listening.

 

LIFE AINT FAIR AND RIGHT & WRONG ARE JUST CONCEPTS NOT NECESSARILY CONCRETE ACTIONS

In my last post I talked about how a lot of times we as BW expect things to be done according to right and wrong, what should be or could be, based on RULES or based on how others fare or act in certain situations or what other *SAY*. IOW’s we like to work and move in the Black & White/Objective AAL.THE.TIME.

 

Even though I know a lot of BW’s gut tells them that doing a certain thing will cost them, a lot of BW still throw caution and logic to the wind and still do it working against their intuition and instinct.

 

BW looove us some “feel good” memes, words and talks, we love when people gas us up with feel good promises. We like to believe the unbelievable. Even though we know they are full of shit, based on past occurrences. Hell a lot of times we don’t even get the benefits of being gassed up as our leeches understand at this juncture it’s not necessarily required to suck us dry.

 

That’s because they know BW live and venture off into fantasy la la land *believing* in feel good memes and promises and actions that we’ve never even seen. We just base it on…… NOTHING but right and wrong. What *should* be and not what *IT IS*.

 

It doesn’t matter that deep down we know some ish isn’t right, and that we may see different results of what others promised or said. We still seem to move and work in the Black and White and the FACE VALUE even when it’s clear it aint benefiting us.

 

Someone asks you for money or resources and you really need it for yourself, and know they aren’t able or WILLING to pay it back (based on past history), but because they *TOLD* you they will give it back you lend it out. And you never get it back and now you are paying the price literally for taking them at face value and not working in the gray area of logic and instinct that told you they CANNOT pay you back and loaning the money to them will place you in a bad place.

 

BW these days don’t seem to think or act in the guise of Actions and behaviors, gut and instinct (the GRAY area and Subjective). Instead we take EVERY.THING as face value. And that is operating from an eyes wide shut stance. And that has clearly been evidenced to be not working too well for us as a collective.

 

What are some of these Black/White areas:

(1)    The belief that if you sacrifice and move mountains for others to climb you will get it in return – based on feel good words and promises and memes; even if past results have shown it aint so

 

  • The belief that because we have a *RIGHT* to do, say something, or act in certain way that it means there will be no consequences – not looking at the “gray” area and using logic and instinct viewing the whole story or bigger picture.

 

  • The belief that because others do something for another group, that will translate to people doing the same for you – based in expectations and not realities and actions (i.e. the GRAY areas)

 

  • The belief that because you choose to do something, others will do the same – based on the false assumption of good will

 

  • The belief that Perception is not Reality and that everyone is able to look beyond the surface and treat you accordingly – based on believing that people are superhuman capable of always looking beyond what you present to them

 

  • The belief that people are going to care for you and honor you, because it’s done for other groups

 

  • The belief that if you keep doing something that isn’t working, ONE DAY it will work or pay off – based on fantasies that are never grounded in reality

 

  • The belief that all of your problems will fix themselves – based in believing that GOD’s job is to literally walk you through all your choices, decisions and actions even when they go against his will or not based in common sense

 

  • The belief that change is futile and selling out even when changing will benefit you

 

(10)The belief that some people are just born to suffer and carry burdens while others are meant to thrive – believing permanent victim status is something to be proud of or is honorable

 

When you are working in the GRAY area though, you use your INTUITION, INCLINATION and INSTINCT to handle the situation as to come out ahead and on top, and not 6 feet under or having a quality of life seeped in suffering.

 

When you work in the gray area, you do not accept everything as face value. It needs to dissected, prodded and probed before you come to any conclusions. It’s not based in emotion and ill logic and false assumptions. The gray area is the area others don’t want you as a BW to see or move in. because that means you have to look beneath the surface, go by others actions and not words and to use those actions as your guide to protect yourself and stay ahead of the GAME.

 

The saying goes:

“WHEN SOMEONE SHOWS YOU WHO THEY ARE – BELIEVE THEM”

 

But what we never hear is:

 

WHEN YOU SHOW SOMEONE WHO YOU ARE – THEY WILL BELIEVE YOU!

And when BW show everyone that they are willing to fight everyone’s fight with no expectation or demand for reciprocations, when we take on causes that do not benefit us at all, when we present ourselves as SHE WOMEN who can “take on the world and traditional male roles” then we are telling other people to BELIEVE US that this is who we are and what we are proud of.

And when they act accordingly, suddenly we fall back and want to be seen as “vulnerable” as everyone else who DOESN’T ENGAGE in those behaviors.

If BW want to receive the same courtesies, concessions and protections that other women have then BW better start adopting the “WHEN IN ROME!” meme.

When you promote your brand of “WOMANHOOD” as sacrifice without reciprocation, being combative and angry and foul-mouthed, working in ILL-LOGIC, etc., then you are asking people to take those perceptions THAT YOU PUT OUT as reality.

When you show others you have ZERO tolerance for strategy they will act accordingly.

NO MORE BEATING AROUND THE BUSH

Although yall aint stupid, I’m just going to lay it out for you.

All the caping done for the Black man and the Black community that BW do, while seeing little to no return for your sacrifice, says that BW are operating from a standpoint of believing that your good will is the same good will others will return back to you. We do not demand proof of collateral. We just do shit for the sake of it and sit back and *EXPECT* that it will boomerang back to us and catapult us to being loved, honored and cherished.

UH NO.

 

This belief that we can act a certain way outside of Black settings and get the same results because “we have a right to be us” is proving to not be working so well for us collectively.

 

There is a saying that Khadija used to say in her blogs writings in how BW should stop “OTHERING” themselves as women (and I’m paraphrasing) but she would say “If you are the only one doing something, it’s probably not the best thing to be doing” something to that affect.

 

IOW’s, if you are the only race/group of women doing something and other groups of women who are faring better than you don’t engage in those behaviors, then clearly you are the one prolly not doing the right or *SMART* thing to be successful and you are “othering” yourself.

This is not saying don’t be somewhat independent or embrace your individuality, but that means stop doing things that only push you further away from being treated humanely as a woman or receiving the “concessions, courtesies, protections” that other women benefit from as Halima has said.

 

Mouthing off at cops when you already know you are likely to be man-handled and possibly killed because your humanity is null and void in most of their eyes, manning the front lines in “civil rights demonstrations for BLACK MEN” and getting tear gassed, shot at, arrested and hosed down, PROUDLY declaring that you re STRONG and can handle everything (be you saying it or showing it through your actions), acting in ways that larger society deems undesirable but claiming “too bad I’m Black and gonna keep it real” and then expecting to be treated and viewed in the same way as others not participating in that way of thinking or acting – you are OTHERING yourself Yet expecting to be treated the same way that other women WHO GENERALLY DO NOT ACT LIKE THIS get treated!

 

Sorry but that aint how it works! Humans do not work that way. Humans work from the standpoint that if someone appears to be embracing of certain behaviors and actions, then they are also embracing of the treatments and perceptions and possible consequences that come along with it. Its common sense!

 

STRATEGY IS FOR THOSE WHO BELIEVE IN STAYING THE VICTORS

If BW want to remain in victim status, then continue to be strategy-less

 

BW, We like to believe (and rightfully so as we are human like all others) that we will be treated accordingly by Right and wrong no matter how awry the situation. We like to believe that because it’s written in ink, the law or told to us by others, that it’s so.

 

NOT always.

 

In a perfect non-racist society and world, YES this would make sense. But we don’t live in a perfect world. BW have to work from INTUITION, INSTINCT and with EYES WIDE OPEN.

 

But a lot of times Black women refuse to acknowledge certain realities. Or maybe not refuse to acknowledge, because I believe a lot of BW already know deep down how things are and cannot handle THE TRUTH.

 

And the TRUTH is, Black women are often dealing in gray areas of life that may not always apply to others on the surface. And need to develop STRATEGIES on how to become the VICTOR and not the VICTIM.

 

LOOK BENEATH THE SURFACE OF WHAT IS AT FACE VALUE –And you will see that Rabbit hole that awaits you if you do not work in Inclinations, Instinct and Intuition – THE GRAY AREA.

Having (or not having) STRATEGY can be the difference between LIFE & DEATH for a Black woman

I’m going to talk to you like I would my own DAUGHTER. So please understand there is no victim blaming here. Just common sense talk that a lot of BW need to hear and UNDERSTAND if they want to SURVIVE and THRIVE in this country these days of craziness.

Ok So I have been following the Sandra Bland story since last week and have been meaning to write about it. I’m glad I waited and here is why:

A piece of me dies when I hear of a sister being beaten or killed by law enforcement. I’m tired of feeling hopeless. But until Police reform is heavily in effect, BW are going to learn the hard way on how to be strategic when in the face of vulnerability.

WHEN YOU ARE VULNERABLE, STRATEGY SAYS DO ANY AND EVERYTHING TO AVOID BEING EASY PREY

Here is something I do not think the average African American BW understands or realizes. WE.ARE.ALONE. Meaning, we have no community, no MEN, and damn near any BW to protect us or our lives and best interests.

We are disposable to most in this world. If we do not take care of ourselves, we will continue to be at the mercy of the predators with no support other than friends and family.

We are hunted by law enforcement loonies because we are easy prey. If BW thought only BM were dealing with police brutality, Driving while Black, filling up prisons, and being killed senselessly by cops was a Black man problem – then we are getting a real rude awakening that IT AINT SO! It’s a Black woman problem and it seems to be growing.

In fact, police brutality cuts across racial lines and genders. So if White people are catching it, what do you think that means for you as a minority woman in a sexist AND racist society where your community and men do NOTHING to protect and fight for your honor?

Black women have spent so much time and energy fighting for the Black man in terms of police brutality, that we seemed to have missed that the rates in which we are equally brutalized and killed is not too far off from BM’s!

What else is growing? – the number of BW being sent to prison, the number of BW killed in prison and the number of BW said to have committed “SUICIDE” while in police prison custody.

SUICIDE IS THE POLICE FORCES “GO TO” WHEN THEY MURDER AN INMATE”

Yall better recognize!

These cops aint of the Andy Griffith Opie era!

First off, the suicide rates for BW in this country are thee LOWEST of all groups! So low that the Army wanted to do a damn study on AA female culture where they can identify why BW are the least likely to commit suicide unlike so many other service members – I.e. WHITE MALES. They wanted to use the low suicide rates and finding of AA service women as a foundation to helping other servicemen and women of other races in decreasing their suicide rates.

So for me or anyone to believe a BW would hang herself in a prison cell is very unlikely. BW just hardly ever commit suicide (at least DIRECTLY but that’s another post for another day) and the stats and studies show this.

But that hasn’t stopped many police entities from CLAIMING this is a form of death of BW who have died in prison cells.

Sandra Bland aint the only BW who has died in prison with the “suicide” as cause of death. A young 22 year old BW in Alabama was recently arrested for stealing a cell phone and died 1 hour later by “suicide” (hanging) while in jail. You just prolly didn’t hear about it. These cops are doing any and everything to vulnerable BW while in their Devils den and playground.

They have taken their LYNCHNGS inside their devils den where they can protect each other from being held accountable.

Yall better recognize!

Once you are behind those bars you are in the DEVILS PLAYGROUND LADIES! He dwells there. And it’s the devils playground because they can pretty much do ANYTHING to you including MURDER and BEAT you and rape you , with having to answer to NO ONE because the system is corrupt and set up to protect the police unions and police officers from any wrongdoing.

That is because if they did the right thing every time, there could be a case for why our tax dollars should no longer go to the city and state for employing officers and their unions would be dissolved. So they have to SAVE FACE by all costs even if its transparent they are as crooked as a witch’s index finger.

Here’s a tid bit. Police depts.. with crooked cops always use the suicide “hanging” as a “go to” and cover-up for murdering inmates regardless of race. I’m not saying inmates don’t hang themselves on their own, but I’m sorry no BW who was arrested for something stupid and in a holding cell is going to hang herself.

I’ll tell you what is happening. These SEXIST & RACIST cops with very little tolerance for mouthy BW are raping and beating these “mouthy BW” to the point then they have to kill them to keep them from talking – and then they fall on the “suicide by hanging” as the “REASON”.

The police system and entity in this country is THOROUGHLY CORRUPT and its purpose and foundation is to protect cops by ALL COSTS. The police entitity in this country is no longer here to protect and serve the citizens. It’s here to PROTECT and SERVE the best interests of the POLICE OFFICERS   – yes event he CROOKED MURDEROUS psycho police officers they employ.

So basically many people have and are killed in police custody and prisons and the SYSTEM and the entity covers it up. It’s corrupt from top to bottom. And guess who the easiest prey is? Blacks, Black women and Poor non-Blacks with no resources.

OPEN YOUR EYES AND CLOSE YOUR MOUTHS!

Here is another not so shocking FACT – A LOT OF RACIST WHITE MEN enter the police force so that they can harass, maim, beat and kill Black(s) and never be held accountable.

And here is the another FACT – THERE IS NO CALVARY WAITING in the wings to come to the defense or rescue of Black women. That means, BM are not going to ride or die for YOU, they are not going to MARCH on your behalf for answers, They are not going to organize and do what it takes to protect you as a BW.

BW are ALONE! And that means VULNERABLE.

So that means for those of us who acknowledge this REALITY and are not still living in LA LA LAND believing we have a community and men to fight and protect us, is that we have to always be in STRATEGY MODE to protect ourselves from being easy prey for predators – this includes LAW ENFORCEMENT.

Right now, you have predatory racist and SEXIST cops with chips on their shoulders and badges to protect them behind all their dirty deeds – even MURDER.

SANDRA BLAND – A CAUTIONARY TALE FOR SISTERS DEALING WITH LAW ENFORCEMENT TODAY

I’m going to state the OBVIOUS before I go into detail about why this sister could have used strategy to avoid being MURDERED.

  • Sandra Bland was pulled over for a bullshit reason. PERIOD.
  • The cop immediately had a chip on his shoulder when he saw who he pulled over
  • The officer had NO REASON TO ARRESST or verbally harass Sandra.
  • Sandra Bland should have never been asked to get out of her car.
  • Sandra Bland had a right to smoke while in her car.
  • Being argumentative and combative and questioning a cop is NOT A CRIME
  • Sandra Bland should have never been physically handled the way she was by the arresting cop
  • Sandra Bland WAS KILLED IN PRISON.

Ok so those are my views on the issue. Sandra Bland should have never experienced any of this.

RIGHT AND WRONG DO NOT ALWAYS APPLY WHEN DEALING WITH CRAZIES

Here is the gray area that BW seem to not understand. In this world we live in today, RIGHT and WRONG aint always going to protect you or apply when you are dealing with crazies!

It doesn’t matter that the cop was WRONG from jump streeet. It doesn’t matter that it’s YOUR right to mouth off to a police officer. We are not dealing with NORMAL COPS today! We are dealing with cops who understand they can pretty much get away with MURDER and have the force and law behind them. BW don’t have that kind of protection and force backing us. So when you are in a situation to simply make your life as less stressful as possible DO IT!

I was pulled over for some bullshit reason not too long ago. Was I irritated? Hell yes. But I kept my mouth shut and said as little to the officer as possible. Every time I have done this, I was let off. But I know these officers are looking for BW who run their mouths and become combative as an EXCUSE to escalate their power and authority. They already have us PEGGED.

I aint falling victim to their game and no smart BW should either. Deal with their rudeness and shitty reasons for pulling you over, and then LATER make a complaint. That’s the smart thing to do these days. Not mouthing off or becoming physically combative no matter HOW WRONG they are for putting you in that situation.

A strategic thinking and acting BW would understand that there is a climate of psycho cops with a corrupt law backing them today who are racists and looking for any reason to harass, arrest, beat and physically harm and murder a Black – that INCLIDES BLACK WOMEN.

Knowing this, it is your job to use common sense when understanding how corrupt and vile and SEXIST the police force and its entity is these days.

Sandra Bland was not immune to police brutality because she talked greatly about it on her Facebook page. Ironically, she ended up being the very victim of such even being aware of the very hostile climate against Blacks today with law enforcement.

Her knowledge of such should have kept her ALIVE.

When you view the video, what we clearly see is an officer who was definitely looking for some sort of escalation – and she gave it to him!

She was about to be sent on her way with a warning. Instead of holding her tongue and recognizing the fact he even stopped her for that bullshit reason was a CLUE that he was looking to escalate. The reason he kept asking her questions was because he knew she was irritated and was also looking to escalate. She fell into his trap.

At the moment he asks her “you seem irritated, what’s wrong” and to put out her ciggie, RIGHT and WRONG does not apply, she should have just done it, got the warning and left and then handled it whichever way she saw fit afterwards by filing a formal complaint. He was giving her a warning and that should have been enough to just avoid any further confrontation whether or not he started it.

Mouthing off to an already on edge cop looking for you to escalate and thus giving him a reason to flex his authority is NOT SMART on a BW’s part. A BW who is already knowing about how the police work in this country towards Blacks in general.

There is a reason I stressed in my last post on strategy on why it’s important to avoid any kinds of confrontations or any occurrences with the law as a BW. You cannot always control being pulled over for bullshit reasons other than being Black. But how that call goes after being pulled over will very much depend on how you handle the situation whether the cop is being a complete out of line ASSHOLE.

A lot of times not even giving in to their obvious attempts to escalate will get you off. They pull Blacks over because they EXPECT confrontation and non-cooperation. Its it right? HELL NO! But as a BW you aint got that much clout in this country to put yourself is deadly situations with law enforcement. And god forbid something happens to you while in their custody 9/10 it’s going to be HELLA HARD to prove there was foul play!

THE SYSTEM IS DESIGNED TO HUNT YOU AS PREY FOR $$$ AND ABUSE

This system first of all has been set up AGAINST Black women. Black women occupy over 49% of prisons in most populated states (I know for New York and California this is about true). The problem is BW make up in these places relativity less than 6%. Yet we fill up the prisons more than half.

So that tells me that we are a TARGET for the prison system and law enforcement. We are the easy targets to fill up prisons and jails and we bring money to the SYSTEM every time one of us is locked up.

BW should be the main group out there informing our young girls and women of this reality. Instead, we are too busy complaining about the BLACK MAN being wrongfully hunted for filling up prisons. All the talk and fighting for BM calling them endangered species and how THEY are victims of corrupt justice system, seemed to have gone over the heads of these sister soldiers that BW ARE IN THE SAME DAMN BOAT! We are the race of women who fill up most of the prisons!

Instead of educating young Black girls in vulnerable areas on WHY we are often picked by law enforcement and HOW to avoid it, we are so busy with our heads up the BM’s asses and now we are getting a rude awakening that we are actually JUST AS IF NOT WORSE OFF as BM are! BM have a community behind them – BW don’t!

Next. What happens inside of prison to BW should also be a concern to African American women AND WHY WE SHOUL DBE DOING EVERYTHING IN OUR POWER TO AVOID GOING IN.

I just read a piece from a White lady who literally wrote about her experience in prison compared to her Black female counterparts. She was going to an ivy league school and had become hooked on Heroine. She ended up getting arrested for possession and serving 2 years in prison. This White lady OUTLINED in detail how African American women are treated and abused and often cited to spend more time in solitary confinement than Non-Black women in the system for the same injsutices.

How BW are upheld to different standards and are often harassed about things by the prison supervisors and guards that White and Non-Black women are given passes for. This was written from her OWN EXPERIENCE as a privileged WW who ended up in prison for 2 years and realized how her White skin afforded her so much privilege in sentencing and getting out. After she served her two years in prison she was later accepted BACK into Cornell University (they knew of her arrest) and graduated – she said this was done with so much ease.

Here is the link – please read this.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/posteverything/wp/2015/01/21/heroin-addiction-sent-me-to-prison-white-privilege-got-me-out-and-to-the-ivy-league/

Sisters, you are going to learn the hard way in these times if you do not have some STRATEGY to stay alive and thrive!

I’m telling you like I would tell my OWN DAUGHTER who I would love.

There are hardly any SECOND CHANCES for us. There was no second chance for Sandra once she ended up in the Devils den and at their mercy. She had ONE chance to get away, and because she couldn’t hold her tongue against an already racist and on edge cop, it cost her, her life. IT’S NOT WORTH IT.

I can guarantee, the mouthing off continued while in the jail and these sexist and racist officers were going to teach her a lesson – and they staged her suicide, but we all know they killed her.

This is the FOURTH person to “die by suicide” in that prison. If White men aren’t safe from corrupt cops, your Black behind doesn’t even stand a chance!

BE STARTEGIC in every aspect of your life BW – it could be the difference between LIFE and DEATH, EXISTING & THRIVING!

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