NAWALT! (not all women are like that)…….

Someone pass the TYLENOL – stat!

I’m going to warn you NOW – I’m venting. What does that mean – MAJOR ADD.  What does that mean? Major jumping around and lots of (   ) usage. I am not the most articulate person with my writing. All I need you to do is try to understand what the hell I am talking about. If you pay attention verrrry closely, and stick it out, it will all eventually come together in a nice tidy neat package. I think.

I had the *somewhat*  unfortunate displeasure (I say somewhat b/c honestly humor and entertainment  is my thing and I must say I have been humored & entertained) of stumbling across a blog (stumbling across un productive things seems to be my specialty these days  – will discuss that later in another post)  for PUA’s (Pick Up Artists). These men (not all, there still seems to be some decent men left who truly understand alphaness) consist mainly of White and Black American males (with a little “other” sprinkled in between) who insist on “gaming” (lying) their way to gain access to women’s vaginas. Wait. Don’t get excited 90% of you ladies out there. The only vaginas that count are the ones attached to the top 10% of the female hierarchy in looks – yes the beloved 9’s and 10’s.  Apparently these women are all over the country in droves waiting to be PICKED UP by an ARTIST.  Why do we care about those hot 9’s and 10’s if we aren’t one (I’m working at it), B/C we are lumped in with them when these men are venting about women in general. And it aint pretty.

In doing so (being the PUA), they justify WHY women need to be lied to and gamed, and that is…wait for it.. B/C women don’t know what we want. We don’t have a brain or mind and we’re just born to love and gravitate towards  assholes, cheaters and jerks aka ALPHHHAS. There is no cultural reason for this b/c women are just “dumb” beings that don’t know any better. According to them Its innate for women to want to be walked over and treated like crap. IF you happen to not be one of those women you’ve been beaten with the ungodly F stick:  (a) fat (b) fugly (c) fold – “fkn old” (for reference according to the PUA manual of female worthiness “fkn old” would be any age after 21)  d) Feminist or F) all of the above. YES, this is it in a nutshell! Therefore, we need these wonderful PUA “ALPHAS” to rescue us women from ourselves. They just want to give us what we want. And that is:

 (1) to be treated with disrespect

(2) lied to

(3) negged (the opposite of a compliment)

(4) the PRIVLEDGE to be apart of a harem

(5) in LTR’s where monogamy is solely for women.

 

I’m Still waiting on that TYLENOL – Damn my My brain hurts!

 

Ok I’ll play for a moment (Warning: I’m having an ADD moment right now). YES, feminism has played *some*  role in the breakdown of male/female relationships. It says women can be empowered through casual sex with any man they choose (or as many as they choose) –w/out consequence  b/c the boys do it. Feminism in some ways wants to bring women and men to the same level playing field in the sexual arena and unfortunately momma nature  isn’t having it. SO the end result is, this push and pull seeps into the male/female relationship dynamics where it doesn’t belong. Men and women cannot be fully equal because we are biologically opposites for a reason – balance.  Sounds contradictory right? No. Balancing the scales in male/female relationship dynamics means that each gender needs to be aware of their role, their biological role, and how to use that to work with the other genders roles.  WHY? So we can have a damn planet full of emotionally healthy stable people! So as a result, you have many free willed women today exploring their sexuality in masculine ways (sleeping around) calling that EMPOWERMENT  and only later finding out that those habits and ways of living was not necessarily how mother nature intended for the female to ROLL. Now does this mean I support and uphold men sleeping around? No. Its disgusting for anyone these days to be care free in who they sex especially if there is an unsuspecting monogamous partner somewhere in the mix. But for a man, sleeping around has less emotional consequences than it does for the average woman. Women were made to connect to their intimate partners for survival, producing offspring  etc.

 

Yes there are women out there who like bad boys, but they like bad boys b/c they make the conscious choice to be seduced and played by one. Very few women are unaware of being gamed. There is no secret to a bad boy. It is what it is. Or rather HE is what he is. The secret however lies within these PUA’s who fake their way to bad boyness to get the women they want. What they don’t want to admit or understand is that for women who seek these kinds of guys its more of an ego thing, and nothing more for most women who put up with this kind of man. For some women her ego being stroked is more important than her sanity or self respect. Now, there are possibilities of coming up with a jerk who put the booty smack down in the bedroom…..kitchen table, bathtub, floor, closet, patio, fluffy or Fido’s  little bed cushion on the floor (stop looking at me. I don’t know anything about Fluffy or Fido’s bed!)- WHEREVER. And as a result, a woman experiences an insane orgasm or two or three and becomes hooked to the male administering the big O. That’s b/c of a chemical called Oxytocin *I know men can be a pain in the arse but I aint talking pain killer Oxycotin* which immediately bonds a woman to her intimate partner after having an orgasm. But if women don’t use their oxytocin properly, it does get wasted on jerks and thus said woman finds herself sticking around  and putting up with a jerk much longer than intended. The ability to be some hot bad boys arm candy (despite his assholeness) is enough for an insecure woman to gladly sell her soul to the MAN. There are a lot of superficial reasons certain kinds of women accept and like to be mistreated and lied to. Usually it’s a lack of self awareness, self esteem and some sort of self loathing that causes a certain woman to squander her beauty and self respect for a temporary fling with what THEY (PUA’S) refer to as Alphas (which they use interchangeably with the words asshole and jerk).  

 

According to PUA’s all women are worthless after 21 and any woman not married with 5 kids by then is a “fugly” who wasn’t a 9 or 10, OR one who rode the “cock carasoul” (I love that one)  for her entire youth (15-21). If you were/are one of the lucky 10% of the female population to be  a 9 or 10 in looks,  by the time you turn 25 you are a washed up old looking ho who kicked all the good guys to the curb to gallivant with “alphas” and assholes. If you didn’t manage to  marry then that means you are a slut who turned down nerdy/good guys in favor of assholes who treated you like dirt. THUS?  *ALL* women like jerks and assholes!

 

WHEW!

 

The rest of the female populace that range in looks from 0-8 – you don’t exist. There is no possible way that a half way decent/attractive woman isn’t a slut with low self esteem. You are ignored b/c you are not a 9 or 10, yet you are lumped in with the 9’s and 10’s (simply for being born with a vagina) who these PUA’s seem to be narrowly focused on. B/C the 9’s and 10’s are women, they represent us all in terms of character and ways of doing. But  remember, these PUA’s wouldn’t touch you with a 10 ft. pole, yet seem to know what all women are like.  So the rest of the 90% of non 9 and 10 women in the world has  to settle for a “wimpy beta” who can’t compete with the jerks for that whole whopping 10% of the 9 and 10 beauties of the world. These men are “worthless” b/c they don’t use their lower head 90% of the time and actually wants a family and children of his own – albeit with a normal, sane, emotionally healthy non feminist ball busting woman. We  ladies who range in looks from 0-8 should be ashamed of the men who can’t be jerks, assholes and…wait for it.. PUA ALLLLPHAS! And we should be more ashamed at WANTING a man that has some self respect, can control his libido and actually was raised to be a decent non manipulating human being. WHY should we be ashamed of this thinking? B/C  according to PUA’s we aren’t “good enough” to attract assholes and jerks. Why I outta….

 

I guess that leads me to the next phase in the maze – what the hell does one consider ALPHA?

 

(There goes my ADD.)  And here it comes again.

 

 Despite popular belief over at the PUA blogs (I’m about to scream so plug your ears and squint your eyes):

 

NOT ALL WOMEN LIKE ASSHOLES

NOT ALL WOMEN WANT TO BE GAMED AND LIED TO

NOT ALL WOMEN RIDE THE “COCK CARASOUL”

NOT ALL WOMEN WILL PUT UP WITH ANYTHING TO BE WITH AN “ALPHA” (we’ll be discussing this concept of Alpha more closely)

THERE ARE WOMEN WHO LIKE NICE GUYS

NICE GUYS DON’T HAVE TO BE WUSSIES OR “BETAS” WHO CANNOT BE ASSERTIVE, LEADERS OR GOOD IN BED

NOT ALL WOMEN LOOK LIKE SHIT AFTER AGE 17

NOT ALL WOMEN ARE FEMINISTS

Unsquint your eyes for one tiny second and please tell me if I left anything out?

 

I’ll be back to discuss these points later this week…

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49 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Liza207
    Jul 26, 2011 @ 16:11:48

    Neecy, I loved it! Funny as hell and straight to the point.

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  2. Liza207
    Jul 26, 2011 @ 16:17:14

    I also love the name of the blog. There needs to be a female counter voice among all the madness. Those guys are completely out of control. And completely delusional and out of touch with reality. But I find their crazy really amusing and tragic, at the time.

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    • Neecy
      Jul 27, 2011 @ 15:01:04

      You like the name? I was thinking of changing it but I do think its kinda cute and girly. Yes, i will still probably post on Roissy’s but with a mind that I cannot take 70% of what those guys on there say seriously. There is too much emotional baggae against wonen and especially only a very narrow bunch of women. I think *some* of them have some really good insights but most are just woman haters. LOL

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      • Liza207
        Jul 27, 2011 @ 15:13:17

        How about calling it: NAWALT! The women they want are the ones banging alphas because if she’s doing an alpha she must really be special. Really? How twisted is that? Begging for alpha male leftovers. LOL!

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      • Neecy
        Jul 27, 2011 @ 16:40:40

        But that’sthe thing. These women are not banging “alphas” they are banging BAD BOYS. There is a difference. Real Alpha males are very picky about the kinds of women they sleep with and engage They don’t just bang “hotties” for notches on the belt. They sleep with beautiful/attractive women but those who are more stable than regualr girls who may be quite attractive but screwed up in the head. Real Alpha males are not attracted to sluts or women who sleep around so easily. Its too much of a risk to his reputation, future and health to do that.

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  3. NeecyFan
    Jul 26, 2011 @ 17:33:26

    Neecy, loved the rant. I frequent the PUA blog you are referencing (you are much more restrained and effective in your postings there) on the regular as well as a few others. As a somewhat happily married man who has gamed more than a few women in my time and still keeps my skills sharp through flirting and the like [no not cheating; although I do keep ‘potentials’ in my orbit].

    I kinda hate when women “stumble” upon blogs like Roissy’s. Why? Not because it reveals our secrets; Women for the most part know men are pigs. I hate it because it reveals in a raw unfiltered way what MOST men really think and feel about women. And no I am NOT exaggerating when I say most. I am a classic hopeless romantic, And I like most men learned looong ago that due to being more emotional in their thinking [and thats not a bad thing by the way, it goes along way to that ‘balanace’ thing you mentioned] women are capable of some amazingly infuriating and hurtful behavior when it comes to the game of male female relationships. Primarily in the way they allow their emotions to completely run the show when initially choosing a suitor.

    An otherwise “nice guy loving, I just wanna be respected and treated well” female will pass repeatedly on just the guy who will offer her what she says she wants, to be with the cheaters, liers, abusers, future baby daddys, dead beat non providers, or get stuck on the “layaway” marriage plan (4-12 year engagement anyone?).

    Why does this happen? Because no matter what a woman says she wants, she will ALWAYS be biologically programed to respond to the most “manly” or Alpha acting potential suitor in her mist. And not coincidentally, these will almost ALWAYS be the most confident, ‘experienced’ men, who just have that “it factor” that gets woman all tangled up emotionally and sexually. And the worst part? It CAN’T be helped! Because those guys or guys who learn to act like those guys, are the ones who, if you are a woman worth pursuing, will approach you most often.

    Bing a bit more in touch with my feminine side than most, I readily admit I would much rather befriend females than males. I find the chit chat and more social interaction of females more interesting and satisfying than the goal orientated convo of males. But I have to confess; being a male, I still do a face palm every time I hear a good female friend go on about how she just wants a strong confident male, who knows how to be a man, and takes charge, just says what he wants, and blah blah blah… because all of those same qualities she ‘s talking about are almost always the markers of the same kind of man who will [almost to the letter] do the opposite of all that nurturing caring bull sh$t. And rightly so! HE’S A FREAKING MAN.

    I’ve learned and most any guy who is comfortable and experienced with women will agree; that “being a Man” in a good male-female relationship means more often than not, constantly metering your affection. Constantly busting up and redefining her understanding of who you are [in a word, being unpredictable]. And never truly allowing her to become your SOLE source of happiness.

    Why? there is no reason why?! Its just biology. Women will either eat you up and spit you out, or loose all sexual interest in you if you do not keep them on an emotional roller coaster of feel goodness and uncertainty. This can range from randomly giving her flowers, or compliments to some women, to blatantly cheating for others. IF you want what ALL healthy HETEROSEXUAL men want from women ie regular GREAT sex, complete and total unquestioning adoration, and comradeship and loyalty, then “them’s the rules” biology has dictated you play by as a man.

    Women on the other hand just have to be sexually desirable…PERIOD. If you are meeting that ONE requirement [and from your picture you are Ms Neecy], then for a woman, half of the battle is already won.

    So is it any wonder that the average male appears so bitter and hostile when he voices his true inner feelings about the opposite sex? From the moment he discovered that he has a penis and that he has a unquenchable desire to insert it into just about every woman he sees; he has dealt with the undeniable fact that woman as a whole will do what ever they can to deny him that biological imperative, and will more often than not use, and manipulate him to get what THEY want because of his biological programing. All the while rewarding the so called “Alpha” behavior of handsome, or gaming males who twist and play games with women’s emotions like puppet masters.

    Don’t get me wrong, Men LOVE women, but as any man who regularly deals with females in a sexual/relationship capacity knows; if it wasn’t for our dicks, most men wouldn’t be bothered with yall in the first place.

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    • Neecy
      Jul 27, 2011 @ 16:23:30

      NF,

      I respect your take on it (except your last paragraph which made me frown) and yes I do believe women generally have a tendency to choose assholes. But I’m just not so sure its INNATE behavior as Roissy suggests. I believe its learned/conditioning. Bad boys are often touted as masculine. Women love masculine men. But women are mainly guided towards the “bad boy” masculine as opposed to the “alpha masculine”. There is a difference between the two. Strong Alphas are leaders, solid yet level headed. They aren’t out trolling for booty from every hot girl they see. To me a real Alpha possesses some restraint and candor and judgment as to protect himself and his future. Sleeping around with slutty women b/c they are attractive is a huge risk to an upwardly mobile Alpha male. I believe Alpha males love beautiful sexy women but don’t feel a need to sleep with low caliber ones.

      Real Alphas make the world turn. The bad boys don’t eat without the REAL ALPHA men running things (i.e the nerds and male leaders in the world). THOSE are the real masculine strong Alpha men – the leaders, movers and shakers. men who get shit done and make things happen beyond using his dick.

      Women (who are not thinking beyond their vaginas) start then start believing after so much conditioning that “masculinity” is entrenched with being a man who is a “player” who is aloof to women and who doesn’t treat a woman with respect. Social media is very powerful. And the good guys, nerds and nice guys are downplayed as being feminized and unexciting. The opposite for bad boys.

      There are still plenty of women who know the difference between a strong solid Alpha male and an asshole who looks good. You males on Roissy don’t seem to want to understand women are not stupid beings. We may PLAY stupid, but we know what’s going on at all times.

      You had me until your last paragraph which I think sums up the problem – you don’t see women beyond a lay and/or your penis.

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      • Liza207
        Jul 27, 2011 @ 17:46:19

        I think just got schooled here. I believe you are very much on point. Your assessment of an alpha vs. bad boy is correct. Most, if not, all of the men that are leaders and movers and shakers are the real alpha males. Those guys are just obsessed with getting laid. Maybe if they had gonads to get what they wanted they wouldn’t be so bitter.

        Beta males are the ones that makes sure that things are in order in society. I would love to meet an attractive beta. I’m not interested in a drama and all that other bullshit (ie mindgames). You know, someone I can get along well with who is pleasant and fun to be around. Damaged men need not apply. By the way, I can spot damaged goods right away.

        Later on, I want to put a particular blog I use comment on, on blast.

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      • NeecyFan
        Jul 27, 2011 @ 22:58:48

        Neecy, remember, I’m a fan! My last statement is an example of the hard truth I was talking about when I said I wish women didn’t have to stumble across PUA blogs. Because no matter what anyone says, to a man, when dealing with a woman, unless she is his mother, daughter, or close relative, she WILL be sexually assessed; and will continue to be as long as he knows her.

        If he finds you attractive, no matter how friendly, close, or off limits he seems, he will always entertain fantasies about bedding your or secretly plot to do so.

        What amazes me so is that woman refuse to accept this as a near certain ‘given’ when dealing with the men around them. Men have and will ALWAYS know that females are emotional, sometimes the just don’t make any sense to us, and that by and large, women are no where near as sexually driven as men. For us, Sex whether good or bad is like eating and breathing. It’s a natural and undeniable driving force that we must deal with nearly 24 hrs a day.

        My last statement was just wrapping that up in a nutshell. But then again, this segways into another common theme from the PUA mindset. Which in reality is a common truth to EVERY man who has ever been over seas. Non American women seem to understand and embrace male sexuality. And more often than not, appreciate when it’s directed at them.

        The main difference I noticed between American women and foreign women isn’t that they are better in their looks, or overall behavior. What makes them so much better to get along with and date [notice I didn’t say preferable] is that they embrace their
        feminine charms – they never assume that a man is paying them any attention simply because he’s nice, or likes her personality. They know and understand, that upon initial interest, he came all the way across the street to say “hey” because he found her sexually desirable. And he decided to pursue her! And ya know what? She’s pleased by that fact.

        In essence I feel our women [American] have lost their charm, they have forgotten that to be a woman is to be the most desirable thing on the planet! Foreign women revel in that fact. Even if a guy has no chance, they thank him, and are genuinely pleased buy his compliments. she understands that even if she turns his advance own, he at least got the opportunity to do the next best thing; flatter a attractive woman by showing his desire for her.

        As a fairly attractive [or so I’m told] guy who has never had an issue attracting females, I can tell you 1st hand. In the states; the average female can be a royal b#tch when responding to something as simple as a “hi how are you” and that’s just in passing!

        So to wrap this up, I don’t see women as just a lay. Believe me, MOST guys see women they are attracted to as beautiful creatures to be showered with affection and time. But never forget, the number one way he wishes to express that affection is to sleep with her!

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      • Neecy
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 04:41:32

        NF,

        Yes I believe men are very driven by sex, some more than others. I agree American women have lost their charm and sense of femininity. And they have done it by giving up sex to easily to men in general. This is why they will sleep around with any man so readily – they believe this is the way to win a man over. Its not that American women don’t know what men really want, its that American women feel that appealing to the lowest common denominator that drives a man (sex) is the easiest way to get what she wants emotionally from him. Its not. So, sex becomes the way in which American women try to “charm” men. They avoid doing the small subtle things to attract a man – and simply go straight to sex. Why would women have to be pleasant and charming when all she has to do is be somewhat attractive enough for a man to want to bed her? He may not stick around but that’s another story…

        Maybe men should start having higher standards?

        I’ve never been to Europe so I cannot speak on European women but I’ll take your word for it. Its waay to easy for American men today. yet you are still not happy even with the fact that you can still get sex very easily from MOST women. There are a lot of low caliber women roaming around and you’re still not happy with that. it seems that you American men don’t know what you want. You get mad when women are slutty and appeal to your lustful desires, then you put down the women who don’t do this by saying they aren’t “attractive”. Women today can’t win.
        American women like myself are getting to the point that its not even worth it anymore to seek relationships with men b/c they all feel that sex is something that should come fairly early (like the 1st or 2nd date) in the getting to know process. we don’t want to wrangle with the beast like some other women so happily do (at the expense of her sanity and emotional well being).

        Yes Roissy’s blog is a very big eye opener at how delusional men are and how truly mysgonist and entitled they are (despite not really bringing anything to the table). But eye openers are good things. Thus, why I started this blog.

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      • Neecy
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 04:46:44

        Yes Liza,

        YES! Despite what is said on Roissy’s blog, attractive beta men are PERFECT mates for a lot of attractive women. You’d even be suprised at the “super hotties” who prefer these men.

        Those men on Roissy are living a lie and in a damn bubble. I am surrounded by very attractive women (some conventionally attractive) and none of them are bitches and certainly do not put up with assholes.

        Its the complete opposite of what is posted on Roissy. In reality, the bitchy women who put up with assholes are the least attractive ones who have nothing really going for them. Hot, beautiful, attractive women do not have to put up with assholes b/c they have options and choices. And usually their choices are with REAL ALPHA MALES and not bad boys..

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    • Alpha Cat
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 11:20:59

      Best reply ever. This sums it up

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  4. Liza207
    Jul 26, 2011 @ 19:09:25

    This should be a place where women like ourselves can come together to discuss the insanity of today’s SMP. And to let decent men know that there are still decent attractive intelligent women who are looking to be treated with respect and that we can appreciate a good man.

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    • Neecy
      Jul 27, 2011 @ 16:28:49

      EXACTLY. And I won’t settle for a man who otherwise refuses to acknowledge this. I’d rather fly solo the rest of my female life than be with a man who can’t see or acknowledge a good woman or that we exist. Its just not worth it to be in a relaitonship with a man who has emotional baggage towards women or who thinks so lowly of women in general.

      I unfortunatley feel this is going to be the way of many women like us Liza. Attractive women who are being lumped in with all women. I’d rather find other fulfilling things to take up my time and space in my life and find a decent enough looking “booty call” whenever I’m in need, than be in a LTR with a cheater or a man who feels treating me unkindly or gaming me is going ot “turn me on” and make me want him more. Nope.

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      • Liza207
        Jul 27, 2011 @ 18:29:03

        I’ll continue to fly solo if I don’t meet a decent guy. The occasional “booty call “sounds good, too. Yeah, a “booty call” that’s young and hot with a killer body to fun with now and then. I just don’t have it in me to put up with bullshit at this point in my life. The guy I settle down with (not settle for) has to be damage-free, period. Neecy, we may have to start looking outside of the U.S. because the men are becoming way too damaged here.

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      • Neecy
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 04:59:50

        I agree Liza. American males are becomming damaged goods. That is why i liked when the BWE blogs would encourage (Black women especially) to expand their horizons overseas with the men there. This is the BEST (and soon to be ONLY) option for sane attractive American Black women. I wouldn’t be surprised if we don’t start seeing a huge mass exodus of attractive BW doing this. that is why i am trying to get in TOP primal shape and stay there b/c a Black woman who is in good shape, and keeps herself up is a woman who will always find a nice youngin to satisfy that need of hers if she chooses to avoid LTR’s or marriage to damaged men.

        I thought it was just a segment of American men that was damaged and delusional and ENTITLED, (you know who and what i am talking about) but after visitng Roissy’s blog I realize that American men in general are damaged goods. Between chasing slutty “hot” women, bad divorces and not getting the chick they wanted with their inability to understand real alphaness its not worth it for a decent sane attractive woman to put herself through being with a man who has baggage or is clueless about what women really want. There is a certain segment of women who want to be treated with aloofness, negged, and left wondering about her status with a man. They can have those chicks and continue foaming at the mouth about them. i refuse to allow all women to be lumped in with them. they are truly fooling themselves and will hit a hard brick wall of “oops my bad” when they do meet that “hottie” who refuses to put up with that crap they try to pull.

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    • Zorro
      Jul 30, 2011 @ 12:38:22

      I wholeheartedly agree. I would, however, advise you to exercise caution as to how you define “a good man” and “a good woman.”

      You’re female, and as such are biologically disposed toward solipsism and self-serving rationalization. Hello PROGESTERONE.

      No offense, ladies, but I’m 50 and don’t have the time to indulge in “pretty lies” any more.

      Now, Neecy. You get your little fanny over here for a sound slapping, girl. Daddy caught you with your paws in the cookie jar!

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  5. Liza207
    Jul 27, 2011 @ 03:32:52

    “…if it wasn’t for our dicks, most men wouldn’t be bothered with yall in the first place.”

    This is interesting. As women, especially in this day and age we really don’t need you (men). I mean, accept for needing you to reproduce. Otherwise, I don’t think we’d be bothered with yall either.

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    • NeecyFan
      Jul 27, 2011 @ 23:13:51

      “This is interesting. As women, especially in this day and age we really don’t need you (men). I mean, accept for needing you to reproduce. Otherwise, I don’t think we’d be bothered with yall either.”

      And you have single handily proven why men and women are at such odds in America today. Men really haven’t changed. but the societal norms along with the mindset of women has.

      A woman “tames” a man if you will. a special woman makes a man want to settle down and provide, protect and care for his woman. if every woman a guy runs across says “i don’t need a man” and in practice acts and conducts herself in a way where all he is good for is entertaining her and laying her…then what do you expect to happen?

      he’s gonna think “AWESOME” and be glad that he lives in an age whee within 4 dates the average girl is sleeping with him. Or smile wryly when a girl wants to just hook up. Knowing that this whole “equality” thing has completely taken him off the hook of any type of male responsibility to a woman.

      I’m only 34, and the things I’ve experienced dealing with these young ladies of today [18-27] was the domain of pure sluts when I was a younger man, heck teen even!

      It saddens me how women have seemingly thrown away everything that made them such a prize to be had!

      Don’t get me wrong, good girls are to be found, but it’s a relative term now. And with the behavior and mindset that is so common now, women aren’t doing themselves any favors on the getting respect front.

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      • Liza207
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 03:16:20

        “And you have single handily proven why men and women are at such odds in America today.” Men really haven’t changed. but the societal norms along with the mindset of women has.”
        I pretty much predicted this response.

        “Men really haven’t changed”

        Yes, men have changed; many of you are emasculated as hell these days. I know what you’re going to say…feminism, right? Yeah, believe that it has played apart but in the end you are men; testosterone filled and all, so don’t know what the whole story is.

        “‘A woman “tames” a man if you will. a special woman makes a man want to settle down and provide, protect and care for his woman. if every woman a guy runs across says “i don’t need a man””

        I predicted this response as well.

        “he’s gonna think “AWESOME” and be glad that he lives in an age whee within 4 dates the average girl is sleeping with him. Or smile wryly when a girl wants to just hook up. Knowing that this whole “equality” thing has completely taken him off the hook of any type of male responsibility to a woman.”

        Sorry, I can’t relate.

        “I’m only 34, and the things I’ve experienced dealing with these young ladies of today [18-27] was the domain of pure sluts when I was a younger man, heck teen even!”

        Well, isn’t this the demographic that guys find the most desirable.

        “It saddens me how women have seemingly thrown away everything that made them such a prize to be had!”

        I totally agree. It’s sad that we have lost our sense of worth as women. It’s a tragedy really. [long sigh]

        “Don’t get me wrong, good girls are to be found, but it’s a relative term now. And with the behavior and mindset that is so common now, women aren’t doing themselves any favors on the getting respect front.’

        Okay.

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      • Neecy
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 05:18:27

        NF,

        A woman does not tame a man. that’s like saying a woman can change a man. American men know how easy they have it when it comes to access to easy NSA sex. Therefore, if a man chooses to “simmer down” he’s doing it on his own accord and not b/c a woman made him. This is where women fall into the trap o’lies that men tell them – that they can “change” and make that player eventually settle down. This is what gets women sticking around, putting up with all kids of mess b/c they believe “he’s going to change b/c I am putting in so much effort to help him change and see that I am not like the other girls”. Psssh. Momma always says “if they come in jeans they will leave in jeans”. doesn’t work that way. That’s like telling a drug addict, smoker, gambler that it was an outside source or 3rd party that made them quit. No, people who overcome addictions and reckless living do so when they have decided within themselves that they are done. No one can make anyone change. This applies to relationships and men. A player settles down when he has tired of the same ole same ole and wants a woman with substance.

        Men today don’t have to settle down, marry to get sex. In the past this was a driving motivator in men settling down. B/C sex was not so easy to come by for men, but by marrying and maintaining LTR’s he knew he would be getting sex consistently without having to go out and hunt for it.

        Nowadays a man can get it so easily and freely, there is no incentive for him to settle down. And now you’ve got so called “alpha” men trying to teach good men how to be pigs. Saying that “is what women want” but not really acknowledging that all these “hot” women they speak of only represent a small fraction of women worldwide. You’ve got 100% of men vying for 10% of the top women. What a joke. Any decent guy who falls for that is only digging himself deeper into a hole. Eventually he will tire of that lifestyle of hunting and become even more hardened towards women. Whilst, he overlooked the attractive 7’s and 8’s who had redeeming qualities.

        For every shallow choice one makes, there will be consequences. I’m content with making a choice for myself that keeps me sane and emotionally happy above all else. Sex is so easy to get and such an easy void to fill for a woman. But so is an emotional fill spent doing things she loves, feeling good about herself, being around family and uplifting friends. Its taken me some time to realize this, but I feel I’m ahead of the curve for finally discovering the truth and accepting it.

        All women want a good man in their life that they can love and cherish and receive those same things in return. These days its starting to become more of a fantasy than a reality and smart women will adjust accordingly – i.e. get sex from a hot guy when she needs it (provided she takes care of herself) and find other ways to fulfill herself emotionally.

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    • Alpha Cat
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 11:27:42

      You’re fucking kidding me right? Who makes the buildings around you? Men. Who built that nice smartphone you’re using to chat up your lady friends every day? Men. Etc. etc. I can go on for days. Now that women have the rights to work, do you think they are going to? Are they jumping straight into manual labour jobs? Welding? I don’t think so. They still want to do the office jobs that require typing, or nurturing jobs like daycare and staying at home with children. Oh, and have a man pay their way for everything. There might be a few out there, but they are exceptions and do not make the rule.

      I’m bringing you truth. Don’t hate.

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    • Alpha Cat
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 11:29:58

      That should help you Liza207.

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      • Liza207
        Jul 30, 2011 @ 04:22:13

        Hi Alpha cat! I don’t think all men are assholes. The culture that Neecy and I come derive from the women are not put on pedestals and we are not treated like princesses. In fact, in our culture the men are put on pedestals and treated like princesses instead. LOL! So, we as a group have never fully embraced feminism because we were too busy “fighting the power” to get fully involved in the Women’s Movement. Which is why there is so much misogyny in the black community–the men are rarely called out on their sexist behavior towards women. The men can be seen in public forums making the most sexist, misogynistic and chauvinistic remarks without really being reprimanded by the women of their race. I of course find this behavior unacceptable and degrading to women but at the same time, I’m not looking to declare war on them. Feminism has given me the freedom to forge the life that I want and limitless opportunities so that can support myself and I don’t have to put up with men who don’t respect my womanhood. That’s as far as it goes for most black women. I think that white women have had it really good for centuries and in the light of what I call “extreme feminism” are coming off as spoiled children throwing tantrums. As I said before, feminism has gone way overboard at this point. It has accomplishment it’s goal and it’s time to put a cap on it already.

        NEECY: @ your whole post – Truer words have not been spoken! I think Feminism for Black women goes as far as the ability we have been given to carve out a life for ourselves as women who cannot depend on men to come and rescue us and take care of us. But Black women also understand that there are many parts of feminism that really don’t apply to us and we should be very cautious about jumping on the men against women bandwagon. It serves us no purpose. Black women need to start understanding there are good men in the world and we need to embrace them. let the other women do extreme feminism and fight men. they’ll only get so far.

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  6. NeecyFan
    Jul 28, 2011 @ 05:47:43

    Liza, i was hoping for more of a, I explain my view give me yours kinda deal, but you seem determined to pull the Roissy card and just parse my words and reply with hostile snipes.

    But I’ll continue anyway. As for your comment about men being Emasculated – As a Guy I don’t really feel that’s the case. These days guys act and feel as free to be “man boys” as ever and that’s the problem in my opinion. Women make men better [just like men make women better] that’s the ultimate intent in the differences between the sexes, to compliment one another.

    But to do so, women and men have to play their roles. And men aren’t doing that [well actually aren’t being given an incentive to] and women refuse to. So everyone is at a stand off of sorts.

    I’m just genuinely curious as to why is it that when males try to give insight into whats on our minds [in an attempt to help females understand] more often than not, the male view is just blown off as irrational, or not worth examining or paying attention to. Like them or not PUA sites are dedicated in their entirety to the understanding of the female psyche and how to get what you want from a woman. Believe me, men take understanding what makes women tick VERY seriously.

    On the other hand, from my best female friends to just young females I know who always seem to ask me for advice; very few women seem to genuinely care or be concerned with what really makes men tick. Sure they ask, they may sit with their girl friends and speculate about or ridicule male behavior, but in the end, when a guy genuinely tells them whats going on they ignore it.

    Look closely at a sight like Roissy’s. If a particular trait about female behavior makes sense or not, we men except it for what it is. Then try to respond to it appropriately to get what we want. Whether it be sex, a relationship, or just to make her go away.

    You know I just had an epiphany! It’s not in a woman’s nature to care about such things (generally). Because in the game of selection, she’s almost ALWAYS the pursued. We are the hunters. Maybe the problem isn’t that all men hate women and just want to use them. Maybe the problem is that as hunters, men are adapting in their skill set to such level of efficiency that he completely understands how to select the prey that gives him exactly what he wants. Therefore all others are tossed to the side or passed up altogether.

    It has never been lost on me or men in general, that when a man wants to get married and settle down he simply does. Guys may complain about not having lots of sex with random women, but almost none complain about not being married, or in a long term relationship…

    your thoughts?

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    • NeecyFan
      Jul 28, 2011 @ 15:55:21

      quick correction, i meant “getting married, or finding a long term relationship” in that last paragraph.

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    • Liza207
      Jul 28, 2011 @ 19:37:07

      NF,

      I don’t think that the thoughts of men are irrational (unless they’re actually being irrational). I don’t have a problem with men voicing their thoughts concerning women. I have been visiting Roissy’s blog for awhile and other blogs where men congregate to share their thoughts on women. I rarely ever chime in because I feel that they have a right to
      have their views. I guess what irritates me the most is when men state that they are a certain way by nature (e.g. promiscuous) and those women should just suck it up and deal with it.
      I agree that due to the feminism women have strayed far away from their traditional roles and I think men have become very confused as to what we want and expect from them as men. Being a fairly traditional women, I do find our current situation very unsettling.

      “It has never been lost on me or men in general, that when a man wants to get married and settle down he simply does. ”

      This has never been lost on me either. Although, women are the gatekeepers of sex; men are the gatekeepers of commitment. I mean, men still do the proposing, right?

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      • NeecyFan
        Jul 29, 2011 @ 04:30:17

        Men still proposing? They should, and when the right one comes along will…

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      • zorroprimo
        Jul 30, 2011 @ 03:26:12

        Don’t judge men because of what you read in the comments at Roissy’s blog. Check out the stupid hating from the posters at YouTube, CNN, or any other site where the posting is not (or barely) monitored for content. The internet is like catnip for people to mouth off anonymously. Racism, sexism, etc, are endemic on the net.

        I really like Roissy’s blog, but agree that 80% of the posters are from retarded mouth-breathers. I’ve also been on women’s blogs where women shit all over men for everything under the sun. Women are no damned better.

        Neecy needs to stop writing columns about jerky men and start writing columns about cunnilingus. FORGET THE COWBELL! MORE CUNNILINGUS!

        I’m Zorro the Moose, and I approved this message.

        NEECY: Yes the internet seems to bring out the crazies or should I say the crazy in people. I don’t mind Roissy himself although I don’t agree with everything he says. He’s a great writer and I don’t think he is such a bad guy in the bigger picture. But some of the readers are clearly nutso. Others are cool.

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  7. NeecyFan
    Jul 28, 2011 @ 06:15:51

    Neecy, I would have preferred to reply directly to you, but the “reply” is missing.

    Either way, I’ve never heard a guy tell a woman that she can “change a man” that’s not what I was implying…(if anything, that’s a thought process I hear nearly solely from females). When I say Tame a man” I mean cause him to want something more.

    You pretty much laid out the reason a man has no incentive to even look for a good woman now, when you said “Men today don’t have to settle down, marry to get sex. In the past this was a driving motivator in men settling down. B/C sex was not so easy to come by for men, but by marrying and maintaining LTR’s he knew he would be getting sex consistently without having to
    go out and hunt for it. Nowadays a man can get it so easily and freely, there is no incentive for him to settle down.” EXACTLY! A mans nature is to satisfy his sexual urges just like he will satisfy his need to eat, or sleep.

    If the he can get the milk for little effort where as in the past he had to buy a farm and raise a cow, what do you think he will do? And I’m gonna let you in on another secret that is only a secret among women. Men DO NOT care that the “easy girls” are promiscuous. Generally guys like sluts. we know what they are for and treat them accordingly. When he decides to settle down, or get tired of hunting (not likely if he’s successful, that’s like a cat that doesn’t chase and kill birds, it’s in a mans blood to chase, he just adapts his end game. instead of bedding a girl he may just flirt with her and get satisfaction from making her feel all crushy) He marries that “good gurl” who
    was always in the wings. Or wifes up his #1 who was always there for him.

    Honestly the only the only hard truth that I’ve noticed when it comes to females and settling down, is if thats indeed a young ladys goal, she better get it over with before 30. Because the availability of “marrying type men” drops exponentially right around then. By 30, most guys who are single are single cause they want to be, or they ain’t worth marrying, or just haven’t gotten divorced yet! 😉

    Holla at me, MS Neecy…

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    • Neecy
      Jul 28, 2011 @ 08:20:21

      I don’t think its a secret that guys like sluts – men are driven by sex – Uh not rocket science that easy girls are a man’s best friend.

      The secert women don’t know is really that sex is the lowest common denominator that any woman can appeal to with a man. So many women think that they can win a man’s heart by sleeping with him. Its just too damn easy! Some women act like getting a man to sleep with her is a prize, challenge to be celebrated. its not that hard for most half way decent looking women to get laid. I have a couple of friends who exercise their God given right to be sexually loose and I also get the unfortuante task of consoling them when shit goes awry with them emotionally or physically. They are not happy women in the least.

      Sleeping ar0und takes a nasty toll on a woman’s body. I have a co worker /friend who just got MRSA and she doesn’t even know if it was from a man she met in vegas and slept with.

      If that is the kind of stuff i am missing out on by refusing to sleep with strangers and have casual sex, then so be it!

      Regarding marriage. I agree it should be done sooner than later. But not out of desperation (for a woman). I for the longest thought it was a great idea, but not so anymore. America is filled with a bunch of damaged self centered/selfish men and its too much of a task to even deal with. I am slowly deciding to do me and enjoy life and travel.

      I don’t agree with Feminism wholey but one thing I can thank God for is the ability for me to provide for myself and have a decent life without a male. B/C a lot of women would be screwed if that wasn’t the case.

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    • Neecy
      Jul 28, 2011 @ 16:48:18

      I don’t think its a secret that guys like sluts – men are driven by sex – Uh not rocket science that easy girls are a man’s best friend.

      The secert women don’t know is really that sex is the lowest common denominator that any woman can appeal to with a man. So many women think that they can win a man’s heart by sleeping with him. Its just too damn easy! Some women act like getting a man to sleep with her is a prize, challenge to be celebrated. its not that hard for most half way decent looking women to get laid. I have a couple of friends who exercise their God given right to be sexually loose and I also get the unfortuante task of consoling them when shit goes awry with them emotionally or physically. They are not happy women in the least.

      Sleeping ar0und takes a nasty toll on a woman’s body. I have a co worker /friend who just got MRSA and she doesn’t even know if it was from a man she met in vegas and slept with.

      If that is the kind of stuff i am missing out on by refusing to sleep with strangers and have casual sex, then so be it!

      Regarding marriage. I agree it should be done sooner than later. But not out of desperation (for a woman). I for the longest thought it was a great idea, but not so anymore. America is filled with a bunch of damaged self centered/selfish men and its too much of a task to even deal with. I am slowly deciding to do me and enjoy life and travel.

      I don’t agree with Feminism wholey but one thing I can thank God for is the ability for me to provide for myself and have a decent life without a male. B/C a lot of women would be screwed if that wasn’t the case.

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      • NeecyFan
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 18:01:45

        Sri about your friend, the possibility of STDs, and things of the like are the single biggest reason why I was never a man whore. And now that I’m married, the shame of bringing something home to my wife is beyond fathomable.

        Speaking of which, I’m in that rare camp of men (at least to hear Roissy tell it) that thinks marriage should be the ultimate goal of any long term romantic relationship. Half the “issues” that are dealt with in the dating scene would be avoided all together if both parties approached dating as a ” interview for marriage”.

        If that was so, neither person would overlook such obvious red flags that commonly pop up, or get caught up purely in lust, or be so blatantly selfish when dealing with potential partners.

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      • Liza207
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 18:02:36

        “Regarding marriage. I agree it should be done sooner than later. But not out of desperation (for a woman). I for the longest thought it was a great idea, but not so anymore.”

        I never wanted kids, so marriage wasn’t on top of the list for me. I’m in my mid-thirties and I should probably desperate as hell at this point but no. I’m fine. And, as you said, the men here can be a pain in the ass and I find it difficult to deal with them. I’m happy traveling, being with family and friends. I have never been man centered (and that isn’t some feminist thing either) .

        On feminism, it has gone way, way overboard and I just don’t see any end to the madness.

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  8. common_cents
    Jul 28, 2011 @ 07:11:45

    Hey there people,just stumbled on this blog.Very interesting points of view here.Sorry got so many thoughts so ill try and make em coherent here.First of all,im a male.Neecy, you are going on about how sex has become cheap, and how easy it is nowadays.Dont you think that having casual sex from some hot guy,perpetuates the scenario?So by engaging in such activities,you are providing easy sex for the guy(no judging,just saying).

    I totally understand what you mean,when you say NAWALT.I’m very grateful that my closest female friends are balanced,know what they want,and dont go for these bad boys(as you say).This is how i see it. Alot of guys resent the fact that they were ignored by some of these desirable females when they were young.It sucks because it is in a way, emasculating.Look i’m sure some of you women who want a good and respectful man, at one time in the past,were chasing assholes,so ignored the advances of ‘nice’ good guys.These nice guys,after being rejected, and overlooked for a period of time become resentful.Its only natural,especially for guys,because of the ego,pride etc.That become imprinted in some mens heads.

    Neecy, as you pointed out previously,For every shallow choice one makes, there will be consequences.That is spot on.There are alot of women(and im only talking about a specific group of women for the sake of the length of this post) who go through their ‘bad boy’ phase and grow out of it,now expecting,or rather, wanting a good nice man to love, and be loved in return.But the wheels have already spun.For that shallow choice a woman made when young has consequences,because the good guy who wanted her,but got rejected,he learned his lesson(picking up bad boy behaviour).So unfortunately,this pattern of behaviour sporadically grows among men.

    Things are definately not gonna change in the short term.This generation is way too deep in for change (at least i think).Change can only come about if women set high standards(please allow me to elaborate).Women set the standards for men to follow.You see,women have the power.90% of the time,they determine whether a man is going to get some that night.It’s just how it is.This is a small but necessary diversion from the point.In nature,everything is connected cosmically.Thats the order of nature.In most (if not all)mammalian species,the female ‘looks for certain things in a male in order to mate.The males have to compete(whether its a showoff or battle to death)in order to mate with the female.If the male does not exhibit those qualities he can forget it.Its the same thing with our mammalian species too.if women say ‘i want a bad boy’,alot of men are going to condition they behaviour and personality to win that female.I strongly believe if alot of women start now by setting high standards for themselves, if women say “you know what you need to show me good male qualities and not asshole qualities before if you want my time”,in the long run,the men who want those women will be forced to change.Its all about reinforcing a certain type of behaviour

    good respectable guy in college who respects women……………….chump
    asshole who is aloof and treats em mean………………………………..stud/omg he so hot

    sorry about the length of the post.lol

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    • NeecyFan
      Jul 28, 2011 @ 16:09:47

      wassup man, good points. especially about the 90% or the power [at least before sex] aspect. I Tell my good female friends this all the time and they are always like ” no, guys have the power because if you don’t give him sex, or he doesn’t like you, he can just find some other girl”.

      And I’m like NOOO! that’s like being in sales and giving the product away free, because
      the inferior competition down the street is undercutting your price! YOU HAVE TO SHOW WHY WHAT YOU HAVE IS WORTH WHAT YOU ARE SELLING IT FOR! [not shouting,
      just emphasizing]

      Like I’ve said before, a lot of these younger females aren’t doing that. And the funny thing? I hear lots of males (esp. young ones) repeatedly tell me how they approached some young lady as if she was a queen and either got rejected, or were disgusted when
      she immediately elevated things to a sexual level, or questioned his sexuality when he tried to take it slow.

      When it comes to the tone of the relationship, Women truly set the pace. A man will only do and get away with what you let him ladies.

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      • Neecy
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 17:11:45

        You’re so right NF. I always say women don’t know what true power we hold. And that is so TRAGIC.

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      • Liza207
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 17:16:24

        Yes, women do set the pace. We always have but in the last 40 years we stopped doing that. I just want to puke everytime I hear a woman say that she is empowering herself by having no-strings/casual sex. What the hell is empowering about being used as a sperm dump and doing the walk of shame out of a guy’s place at whatever a.m. in the morning?

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    • Neecy
      Jul 28, 2011 @ 17:08:06

      Hi CC! Thanks for chiming in and i think you made some really good points.

      (1) Regarding the sleeping with the hot young guy. There is really no other choices left for women who decide to go solo. I’m not saying sleeping around with different men, but women have sexual needs to. So if a woman is not able to find a stable relationship or a guy to settle down with, and has decided to no longer put all her eggs in that basket waiting for it to happen, she may as well find an attractuve guy she can mesh with sexually and see whenever she needs some injections (lol). Its not ideal but what else is there for a single woman past the desirable ages to do? I mid 30’s although i still look younger.

      (2) I understand about the good guy being overlooked in college. It sucks and yes it very common for women at that age to go for the “bad boys”. And yes the suckier part about it is its when these girls are in their prime of beauty and still young. But what is really going on is lack of maturity, and with age comes maturity and unfortunately some learning. So that is why women wisen up later in their late 20’s and 30’s b/c they are more mature. Its not some evil sinister plan to suddenly try to snag a good guy b/c she isn’t in her prime anymore. Its just she has matured and realizes that jerks, bad boys and assholes are for the birds and understands they are not true representations of what real men are. It may seem like they do this on purpose, but really its just nature and natural. The older you are means the more experienced and knowledgeable about things you are. When you are 18-25 you are still trying to find yourself, and a young attractive woman that age has many suitors vying for her affections. Its usually the bad boys who are very persistent and outwardly forward in seeking her attention and affections. The nice/good guys are still young themselves and unsure as to how to approach a beautiful girl he likes. So he misses out. Can you imagine why she would choose the wrong guy? Many young attractive girls choose the bad boys b/c they have a wrong sense of what masculinity is.. Therefore the bad boy to them represent what a supposed “real man”.

      (3) We are ————– on the issue of women having total control on their sexual value. Women today don’t seem to understand its we who drive the sexual market. Men will always want sex. Whether they have to work for it or whether its tossed in their hands freely. Too many women today simply have no standards for themselves and think sex is a way to a man’s heart. This makes it very difficult for those of us, who want to maintain *some* kind of chasteness. B/C men don’t stick around long if they can get sex freely and easily from another woman. Last date I went on within an hour the guy was talking about sex. I was so mad but realized he is just a product of our time where men get sex like they within an hr of meeting a woman. That is why I am losing hope b/c I won’t do it.

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      • NeecyFan
        Jul 28, 2011 @ 17:41:16

        Agreed, it’s funny how we are saying the same things yet having to hack through the jungle (so to speak) to meet in the middle.

        In the end I think Males and Females want the same basic things from a relationship. We are just coming from two fundamentally opposite ends of the spectrum, but as long as we can realize and understand this and meet in the middle, things should work out.

        But there are other obstacles working against us as well. Such as the break down of the family, and repeated cycles of males AND females being raised with no father in the home, or a extremely young parent with no support, or the wrong support.

        Honestly I don’t think the problem is a man/woman issue. I feel it’s a FAMILY / CULTURAL breakdown issue.

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  9. common_cents
    Jul 28, 2011 @ 23:25:42

    hey NF,good point on the inferior competition undercutting the price,lol.Its almost tragic.I hear this from alot of females too.But this is where women have to show their strength.oh boy i cannot tell you how many times i hear this from women..”oh im a strong, woman”,paying lip service..which is great,but SHOW ME HOW STRONG U ARE (emphasis,not shouting).It is in these times where your strength as a woman needs to show. If 10 men in succession pass you over because you’re not giving them sex, women should say “well too bad”.Yea i know its hard,the ego takes a massive hit, you begin to doubt yourself..but you hold your ground.Women who are “genuinely” strong will stand their ground.Thats the problem today, there are alot of women who are neither strong nor empowered,but wear a facade which displays so called strength or empowerment.You dig deeper and you see there’s absolutely nothing behind the facade.This delusion of strength is reinforced by the mass media.

    NF states a good point about the problem being a family/cultural issue.single parent households,coupled with the pervasiveness of the media.here’s an example of how i see it.
    A girl growing up in a single parent household has a void of what relationships should be like.That void NEEDS to be filled,so its filled with tv shows of bad boys and their swag,and how one girl changes them at the end (the wedding crashers anyone) or disney cartoons of how the ‘princess kisses the frog,and the frog turns into a prince’.subliminally and subconsciously,the mental ‘jigsaw puzzle’ of what relationships should be like is complete……rather than seeing mummy and daddy have small arguments here and there,and then RESOLVING it or seeing daddy provide for mummy and the household…coz its a single parent household.SO the girl now consciously pursues bad boys in the hope of subconsciously kissing them and turning her into her prince…but alas….. Definitely a family and cultural (media) breakdown thing

    Neecy,you raise a good point about how maturity comes with age (not necessarily,but i get your point) and how women wise up in their when they age. But as you said,with every shallow decision comes consequences. Alot of these women don’t know any better when young, but those patterns of behaviour set about a chain of events in men.Its like driving down a highway doing 200mph,then you realize there an animal 5ft away, you slam on the brakes,but that doesn’t mean the car suddenly stops.In the same way a women who has reached maturity after ‘reinforcing bad boys’ by rewarding with sex,might find it hard. Sad thing is that it affects alot woman.

    How can things change?there needs to be a revolution of sorts.With revolutions, sacrifices need to be made. In past revolutions(french,russian),people had to die…even in your country USA (im not from the states) people had to die during the civil war for change.In the context we’re talking about, many women will need to become celibate in order for things to change. Now i know i sound like some crazed revolutionary,but drastic times call for drastic measures. If alot of women come to the conclusion that sex has become too easy,and that they’re not giving it up anymore until they get what they want out of a man, men will be forced to change their behaviour to suit those expectations.The question is…which woman is willing to make that sacrifice?

    umm sorry for the long post again

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    • NeecyFan
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 04:46:17

      WOW CC, man you and I must be channeling from the same social conscious! I was intentionally avoiding illustrating the family break down scenario, because in America that is a very sore point with a lot of my contemporaries. And rightly so, many have experienced it first hand (especially in the black community).

      Unfortunately it’s something that is immediately dismissed as a cause, or too tender to be discussed because of the personal baggage that it leaves with those who grew up that way. Believe it or not, I have been cursed out, or disregarded as “out of touch” simply because so many young people, or my peers actually believe that the single parent household is the norm.

      It’s not their fault that things didn’t work out between their parents or both parents were irresponsible when young and they had to deal with that as part of their lives growing up. But it REALLY changes the dichotomy of how you deal with long term relationships as you grow up. I was fortunate to grow up in a married two parent home, (parents still married after 40+ years…) and things as elemental as how to deal with disagreements, or male female roles in a relationship are completely shot. Everything is so upside down.

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      • NeecyFan
        Jul 29, 2011 @ 04:56:47

        line through dichotomy, that word is all wrong, “understanding” is better. [see, that’s what i get, tryin to sound all smart and sh#t =P ]

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    • Neecy
      Jul 29, 2011 @ 17:13:59

      CC & NF,

      You guys are very in tune and seem to know what’s really going on!! Are you from Europe too CC?

      Yes, I feel with a change in how society props up men and women relationships we can see a change. But the real change will not come until people start denouncing single parenthood. This is the CORE of the problem right now. Too many women raising children alone. Women cannot make babies by themselves, THUS that means children need BOTH the mother and father to raise them. If not, men and women could get pregnant on their own without the help of the opposite gender. God set it up that way for a reason and people are going against the natural order. You need a MAN and WOMAN to raise a child properly. Not just one.

      My grandmother and a lot of my ignorant relatives are always foaming off at the mouth about how a woman can do just a good job raising kids alone than some with husbands. I just want to SCREAM when I hear them talking like this. That is how ingrained it is in the minds of so many people that women raising sons and daughters alone is “just fine” NO ITS NOT. I don’t care how much money or education the woman has. Its not fair to a child not give them the opportunity to have a male figure in their lives.

      I have a cousin who has said “if I don’t meet a husband by a certain point, I’m going to the sperm bank”. HUH? I asked “why would you do that!”. Yes a lot of feminist women are doing this and even encouraging other women of means to do it “b/c they can”– sperm banks have had an almost ten fold increase in business from single middle aged women wanting children. I read a lot of womens mags and often this is a common meme: “its okay to go at it alone” Its so selfish to me. Just b/c you “can” do something doesn’t mean you should do it! I really want children of my own. But if its not in the cards for me, its just not and I will accept that. I’m not going to bring a child into this earth half assed. I want them to have a family and a father to balance out the things I can’t do as a woman.

      People just seem not to understand that men and women have very distinct roles in this world. Feminists don’t want to acknowledge this nor the good in men and neither do misogynists who want to strip women of everything good about us.

      Right now everything is about quick easy sex, and shallowness. And yes you have a lot of women being raised in single parent homes with mothers who are not careful about how they play out their dating life in front of their children. it amazes me to see so many single mothers just bring dude after dude around their daughters. And usually these men are users and abusers. The daughters then see and believe these are the only kinds of men she should go after (modeling her mother’s behavior).

      When single motherhood is no longer celebrated and supported, then we’ll see a change. Until then, things will get worse before they get better….

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      • NeecyFan
        Jul 29, 2011 @ 18:13:03

        AMEN! Preach it Neecy!

        p.s. I’m from the US. I’m just a ex-Army brat and current career military hack.

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      • Liza207
        Jul 30, 2011 @ 02:09:35

        Neecy, you said it all. I just wonder when they are going to get a clue. The children they’re creating out of wedlock deserve so much better. I see this spreading out into mainstream society as well. If this continues America will be on it’s way to becoming a third world country. We just have to look at the black community to see where the rest of society is headed.

        NEECY: EXACTLY. Its just irresponsible self centered behavior and its going to cost this country. Any place where women are left to raise children themselves, is pure chaos. Not b/c women don’t know what they’re doing, but b/c children need male authority in the home.

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  10. zorroprimo
    Jul 30, 2011 @ 07:16:37

    A few suggestions for a name change for this blog:

    Neecy’s Species

    Chicks Love Spankings

    Neecy’s Curvacious College of Cunnilingus

    Smokin’ Hawt Black Chick Diggin’ on Beta Nerds

    The Anti-Roissy

    How to Play the Violin With Your Tongue

    …just a few thoughts. Trying to help here, girl!

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  11. zorroprimo
    Jul 30, 2011 @ 07:18:34

    Oooh! Another one:

    Flirting & Squirting!

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  12. zorroprimo
    Jul 30, 2011 @ 07:58:12

    Conductor Neecy’s Chocolate Choo-Choo, Stopping at Penetration Station
    Put on Your Strap-on, Girls!

    [Chicks dig strap-ons, and none of the trogs from Roissy’s will come near you now.]

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