Ladies imagine – or rather relive what you just did this weekend. You’re walking throughout the mall, down the street where there are a line of stores. In the window you see an incredible pair of shoes. They are HOT! You cannot take your eyes off of them. They stop you in your tracks. You keep looking until you finally convince yourself to go into that store and take a closer look. They are some crazy shade of red, 4-5” heel, have an incredible shape/style to them and you know if you wear those bad boys everyone is going to be looking at you in utter AWE, HATE, DISBELIEF, JEALOUSY, ENVY, LUST, CONFUSION when you strut through, down, across, over, ON TOP OF (hey where you go or who you do in your hot high heels is none of my bidness) where you are going. You may even get the gonads to get your Marilyn Monroe on and stand over a blowing air vent in the middle of the street just so people can take a photo – that’s how damn hot these shoes are.
You’re in the store holding the shoe mumbling the lyrics “me so horny, me love you long time” while a complete different song is playing throughout the store. You start feeling up the shoe, rubbing on it, you even get the urge to lick them but don’t out of fear of being arrested and escorted out by mall security and forever placed on the shoe sex offender list. At the height of your “me love you long time” excitement in seeing, feeling & dying to lick the shoe, those damn spidey senses start kicking in:
SPIDEY SENSES: * don’t do it NEECY, LIZA, they aren’t worth the pain your feet will feel when you wear them out. Plus you can’t really afford them right now. And what the hell are you going to wear with them!? And last but not least, can you wear them around mommy without her clutching her pearls and daddy without him giving you the side eye*
So as you walk out the store regret -tingly looking back at those hot shoes, the store sales rep (aka the devil) tells you they are on sale for a vewwy vewwy good price (she forgot to put the sign up – yeah ok). That’s all you needed to hear! HOT, SEXY annnnnnd
CHEAP competivley priced?! Pssh. You whip out the credit card and next thing you know you are going home with a hot pair of shoes. If you’re really a shoe pimp, you’ll be taking home at least, at MINIMUM another hot, sexy, annnnnd CHEAP Competivley priced pair from a different store. You get home. Frantically and passionately start throwing shoe paper everywhere ripping open the box to grab ahold of your hot sexy crazy shade of red high heeled shoes. Breathing heavily from all the excitement you finally put them on your feet and start walking in them around the house. RUT ROH! Hot shoes not feeling so nice on the footsies! Then you limp to the closet. RUT ROH! There is nothing in the closet that you can wear with them (except what’s in your lingerie drawer). You scoffingly look down at those attractive boring realistically wearable shoes you have stashed in the back of the closet behind all the “WHOA” shoes. damn they look so good! Your common sense & desire start having a tug of war in the middle of your closet over the shoes. Common sense says take them back they are a waste of your money & time. Desire says keep them b/c they look so damn good. God finally speaks and warns you that these shoes are trendy and will probably not be the best for you to wear around all the time, but maybe for special occasions like: a trip to the club, local bar, night out on the town in Vegas, strip club.
IOW’s they are not for daily or long term use. You know on the average day, you should be wearing nice attractive shoes that while may not cause people to stop in their tracks and say “WHOA” you know those shoes you can count on to be comfy, allow for long-term use/wear, will never go out of style and the color & style is “closet friendly” in that you can always depend on them for most any outfit you wear. And most of all you can wear them around mommy and daddy and not get the clutching of pearls and the side eye.
Now we know what men go through when they get caught up with slutty, crazy, bitchy women – who look good! Common sense tells them “don’t do it, bitch is looney”, but desire tells them “but dayum she looks good!”. In the end the wiener wins (hey that’s a nice catchy phrase! *in the end, the wiener wins*. Ok back on topic.
If you read the PUA Blogs long enough, you will start realizing there is a common theme amongst the men there. That all the women they have dealt with have been either: (a) crazy (b) bitchy (c) slutty (d) all of the above. BUT the one redeeming factor they give themselves for dealing with such women isss *drum roll* SHE WAS A HOTTIE! So in essence these men are giving themselves excuses to deal with such women simply b/c of their “hotness”. The same reasoning women give for wearing really hot shoes that hurt like hayell or really tight uncomfortable clothes that give you yeast infections (b/c they look good).
Look I have no issues with admitting and acknowledging that men are visual creatures. Just like I have no issues with admitting that women love a bad ass pair of shoes regardless of how they hurt. Men are *PRIMARILY* (key word Primary meaning first and foremost) driven by a woman’s looks. However, that is why God gave us a secondary! so that when the primary looks to good to be true, you can use secondary choices to determine whether or not its worth pursuing. There comes a hefty price tag in the long run when one chooses something solely for looks. Those red hot high heeled shoes we women love to wear will eventually damage our feet if we continue wearing shoes like that over long periods of time and often. Just like getting caught up with a slutty, crazy, bitchy woman WHO LOOKS AMAZING will cost you down the road. Ok I get it! Men like Hotties and women like men who are stallions in the sack. But then common sense and those secondary choices come in that tells us that sometimes the hottest or best in bed is not always the ones we should be looking to as long term mates. Men like to use their biological desires of wanting good looking women as excuses for choosing bad women. UH UH Fellas! Not an excuse. Just like I will not let us ladies off the hook for having a biological desire to be with a man who is a stallion in the bed but we know he’s no good in other areas. There is free will and choices, and there is also consequences for bad choices.
What bugs me about the hypocrisy of men (more so the good guys who keep getting burned) is that suddenly all women are sketchy characters & messy – to not be trusted or believed. They *SAY* they want beautiful respectable women, but their feet say otherwise. Suddenly after dealing with these looney BUT HOT women , they surmise that all women want to be treated like wet food stamps. Well yeah if you are only dealing with crazies, slutties, or bitches then what else do you know?! Why can’t men just admit that these women are ideal to them for a number of reasons – one being they look good, but also b/c these women are easily manipulated, easy to bed, easy to be aloof to, easy to not have to commit to or work for, easy to play on their already low self-esteem and get what you want. But when these women retaliate by being their true to form selves – sluts, bitches, etc.,, then all women are the problem? How can you take a segment of a population (a very bad example of that population at that) and apply it across the board to fit all of that population?
I don’t really care to focus on the bad boys in this topic b/c a bad boy is what a bad boy does. I want to focus on the Good guys. The guys I LIKE. A good guy IMO is a guy who is intelligent. One who has elevated morals and values and COMMON SENSE. Typically comes from a solid foundation and has seen good women as great examples of womanhood in his immediate family to draw upon. But he’s a guy with a penis and also wants to get laid by the Hotties. No problem. That is, if he sees it for what it is – SEX with a nutcase or emotionally unavailable woman who will be sleeping with another dude possibly an hour after wiping your protein shake from her nether regions. The problem comes when he starts seeking out these women thinking they will not only be super hot, but will also be the perfect g/f or wife. So he gets caught up in wanting to be the man with the hottest girl and starts overlooking some of the OBVIOUS signs that she is a maniac who should be avoided. When he gets burned by these women, he starts becoming bitter and angry at all women. He overlooks the women who are attractive but not edgy or slutty enough and who would better compliment his life. These good decent attractive women are ignored, while the slutty woman is elevated.
So, my thought is this: Women today who are attractive but not in a slutty edgy kind of way are being left out in the cold. Its either if you can’t beat em join em, or simply rely on the reality that 9 times out of 10 you will play second fiddle to a more slutty, bitchy, crazy or all of the above woman. But you will also be lumped in with said women and made out to be a “typical woman” who doesn’t know what she wants, likes to screw men over, and play games.
If you are finding yourself lingering around the mid 30’s mark, you better have a plan B in action that doesn’t include a man. b/C in my experience, if you are not offering your ass up as a buffet within the first 30 minutes of a date, you’re screwed. And I don’t mean that literally. *Pouring liquor on the ground for the good girls* R.I.P.