Am I a crazy conspiracy theorist who is *just seeing things*?

Black Women – The TV is not your friend!

I don’t even watch Television anymore. And the minute I start saying to myself “turn on the tube” I am reminded each time why its not worth my sanity.

WHY OH WHY Does America insist on these images of Black American Women?

Its bad enough we have movies like THE HELP

and PRECIOUS

receiving so many accolades. America sure does love them some fat asexual Black women. So much that anytime one appears in a movie, suddenly the movie gets all kinds of Oscar buzz and support.

Well another one bites the dust! Much to my dismay, Holly Robinson Peete from the show “The Talk” has not been asked back. As many of you may or may not know, Holly starred years ago in the popular show 21 Jump street. She is a very well established, well spoken, THIN, ATTRACTIVE Black actress & spokesperson whom seemed to do quite well representing Black women on this show. While I have only caught glimpse of the show here and there, the times I did, I was very much impressed with Holly and how she represented herself. She’s like a Black diamond in the rough in terms of positive images of Black women on television and talk shows. I can also guarantee you many Black women of a certain ILK also find Holly a breath of fresh air due to the constant bombardment of negative, masculine, asexual images we see in the media of ourselves. Its not often that American Black women (or anyone else for that matter) gets to see images of thin attractive well-spoken Black women in the spotlight.

As always media sees these kinds of Black women as a threat. Look at any talk show, reality show, or show in general with a Black woman and she is usually ALWAYS FAT sometimes STUPID, always LOUD , and usually UNNATTRACTIVE or Asexual in some manner – and in worst case scenarios – all of the above. Or the opposite, she is overly crass and sexual to the point no one would take her seriously as a wife or girlfriend. Now for whatever reasons THE TALK chose not to renew Miss Peets contract. But the bigger issue is the next Token Black woman they chose to replace her and WHY. Miss Peete has been replaced by the loud, crude Black female COMEDIAN – Sheryl Underwood.

How did they go from Peete to Underwood and what was the decisioning process behind it? Oooooh THE VIEW has Sherry Shephard. let’s compare and contrast:

Sherry Shephard – Sheryl Underwood – Aisha Tyler
Sherry Black – Sheryl Black – Aisha Black
Sherry comedian – Sheryl Comedian – Aisha comedian
Sherry fat – Sheryl fat – Aisha thin
Sherry – THE VIEW TALK SHOW – Sheryl- THE TALK TALK SHOW – Aisha – NOT EVEN CONSIDERED

By God I think i figured it out! I guess Miss Peete did not make middle American White women feel comfy enough to TALK. They Miss Oprah so they need an overabundance of Oprah’s to feel that void I see.

Miss Sheryl Underwood has no mainstream appeal whatsoever. I’m sure no one knows who this woman is besides Urban Black audiences from the 90’s where and when she was most popular. She has no redeeming qualities at all from what I have known of her. So I am trying to figure out the connection she would have with middle American White women compared to Holly who is a former actress, spokesperson, mother, wife.

If they wanted a Black female comedian to replace Holly, shouldn’t they have chosen someone like Aisha Tyler who’s funny as HAIL and THIN and BEAUTIFUL?

nooooo of course not! She has no root name “SHER” in her name and she isn’t FAT. Middle America White women seem to have a problem viewing these kinds of Black women on their television sets (thin, attractive, well spoken Black women). They vote for the most unattractive Black women to parade on their tubes and represent us. So much that its becoming obvious as to what is at play here.

Back to Miss Underwood. I’m not picking on her looks. The fact is she is a bad representation for Black American women on *ANY* talk show. I have known of Miss Underwood since my college years. She was a “chitlin circuit” (Oh God please White people don’t ask what that means lol) Black comedian who was extremely crude, loud and unlady like – and not very attractive. No feminine bone in this woman’s body whatsoever (please feel free to google her). She is blissfully ignorant and ghetto (at least that is how she presented herself). Many of her jokes are vulgar. Some may be saying “why all the hate towards an innocent Black female comedian who is just taking a job offer extended to her” You are right. Cheryl is not the real problem here – she is just a convenient tool in a bigger more sinister mission.

I know I have quite a few White males who post here and I am really curious to reach out to you and ask you how these images of Black women may or may not affect how you see Black women as a whole in general. The reason I ask this question is b/c as Black women we are recognizing there is a heavy HEAVY campaigning, pushing of asexual MAMMY like images of us in the media. Rarely do thin young attractive well-spoken feminine classy Black women get as much spotlight as the loud, nasty fat ones. WHY? And who does this benefit when these kinds of images of Black women are consistently shown in the media?

It seems American White and Non Black women feel most comfy seeing the asexual mammy like images of Black women in the media- and for good reason – LESS COMPETITION. But I do wonder if the intended beneficiaries (Non Black men) do buy into these images. Even if not for seeing Black women as potential lovers, g/f’s and wives but just in general as to how you see us as women. There is no denying that women deemed attractive in the eyes of males generally fare the best in the world. If a woman is not, she misses all of the goodies that come with men finding her attractive. One Black Empowerment woman said it best:

the discussions we have been having for a while now about a general move to de-feminize black women and make them out to be not worth any mans attention in fact to deny them the Curtsey, Concern, Consideration and Concessions readily extended to other women. Indeed we live in a situation of patriarchy, we are not yet a society of gender equality and therefore a female has ‘currency’ if she can elicit the CCCC response.

It made me also reflect on how black women, mostly unknowingly, have begun to cooperate with this dynamic to push them out of the female category, with the attendant benefits which come under the terms of patriarchy, mostly because of being blind to the situation and to the intentions to push them out of a profitable category.

I would like HONEST feedback b/c I have never really had these discussions with anyone but Black women. Its like preaching to the choir with each other as Black women. But I do wonder if the intended results work. I also do know these images affect attractive Black women who fear crossing over the color lines to date men of other races b/c they start believing these men may not be able to see them beyond the masculine, unattractive negative images they see on TV and in media. So please be honest. As you know Liza and I are both very much passionate about changing the images of Black women in the media and we would like to get as much feedback from other races of men on this since we believe these images are directly aimed to the psyche and EYES of Non Black and White males for very obvious reasons.

Granted, there will be a number of Non Black males who simply are not attracted physically to Black women no matter how many good or bad images they see in the media. But I do wonder how much of the “perception is reality” meme affects this non attraction to Black American women & if it really stems from the overly masculinized asexual images they are bombarded with daily in the media of Black American Women. The constant focus on the most non feminine types of Black women in media is to send signals that Black women are not to be seen as attractive and most of all as potential lovers, g/f’s and most of all WIVES. I do wonder if the media is winning.

We all know that Black women have been the last of the Mohicans to jump on the swirling bandwagon. But nowadays, more young and middle aged Black women are considering it. Also the fact that Black American women attend colleges and Universities at higher rates than Black males thus placing us in and around Non Black males more than ever. Also from college many Black women move into work settings surrounded by Non Black males as well. I do wonder if there is a concentrated effort to keep attractive Black women out of the dating market and why. As I said Perception starts becoming reality. Often times collectively Black women are lumped together and not seen as individuals.

Another effect of this is indoctrinated Black women start believing in these images and focus on upholding them in real life. You have many Black American women who do really believe that fatness is beautiful, and crude, masculine , overly sexual behavior is ACCEPTABLE, and even attractive. So we have an even bigger issue when the victim joins in and actively contributes to their own self destruction and collective sabotage.

I find America is obsessed with the fat Black non-threatening asexual masculinized Black female or the overly sexualized Black woman. There is no happy medium Black girl ever shown. We are identified to be either on one end of the spectrum. If you are a Black woman who isn’t, you are kinda stuck wondering where you fit in in this world and society.

I have turned off the Television and rarely watch. I refuse to see or support any movies or any forms of entertainment that continue to marginalize and celebrate the most unattractive, most un feminine, most asexual, most overly sexualized Black women like this while the opposite image of decent, sane, feminine, physically fit Black women is NEVER embraced or celebrated.

So the question is CUI BONO? and WHY. But I am also curious to see how others (men especially) are affected if any. Are you apathetic and don’t notice, don’t care or does it or has these images made an impression on how you, your friends and family view Black American women as males.

The last question: Am i and a bunch of other Black women just crazy conspiracy theorists just seeing things or is it all just a co-inkydink?

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75 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Zorro
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 05:15:43

    Aisha Tyler plays Lana Kane on the awesome cartoon, Archer, which I LOVE!!!

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 10:08:16

      I don’t watch TV so i’m not familiar with that show. But its good to see she is at least working. Funny though, its BEHIND the camera. But i am happy nonetheless she is working. She is smart, funny, witty and gorgeous!

      What time and days do the show come on? I may support it and watch.

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      • Andrew Medina
        Sep 12, 2011 @ 10:12:55

        Voice acting is actually tougher than live action for the actor. It forces the actor in question to truly master their voice. That and you’d be surprised the amount of A-listers who do V/O work for video games now.

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        • Neecy
          Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:16:56

          I can only imagine. Do they get paid well for voice overs?

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          • Andrew Medina
            Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:27:23

            It’s like regular acting, it depends on the gig. They don’t get paid as well as live actors, but the video games and US based animation industries in particular aren’t too keen about walking into the same trap that Hollywood did.

            In other markets voice actors can make a killing, here in the states? Not so much.

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            • Neecy
              Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:31:55

              That’s interesting. But i guess its not easy to be able to change your voice to fit a character you are not physically playing. That seems much harder b/c you have a lot of deflection and thungs you have to do to chaneg with the characters movements, expressions etc.

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      • Zorro
        Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:14:19

        OMFG!!!!!! YOU’VE NEVER SEEN ARCHER???!!!

        It is a merciless piss-riot of hysterically funny! Archer is the world’s most dangerous spy. He is a vain alpha male with a small penis who was once in love with co-worker and super-spy, Lana Kane (Aisha Tyler), who has a chest that could sink the Titanic and big hands. You can buy a digital episode on Amazon for $1.99. Probably you can check it out on YouTube.

        Seriously, it is one of the funniest f*cking TV shows in history!

        http://www.amazon.com/Archer-Season-H-Jon-Benjamin/dp/B00475B0G2/ref=sr_1_1?s=movies-tv&ie=UTF8&qid=1315851057&sr=1-1

        Maybe it’s a guy thing. It’s great comedy, and if you want to see the difference between alpha male and beta male: Archer = alpha male, Cyril Figgis = Beta male. PERFECTION!

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  2. Marellus
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 06:38:00

    Neecy.

    You have a point. But how do you explain Tyra Banks, Halle Berry, Thandie Newton, and Naomi Campbell then ? Michelle Obama is quite attractive as well.

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 10:14:51

      Marellus,

      Yes those Black women are in the media, but how often do you see them? They are rarely represented in comparison to the fat mammy stereotype or jezebel.

      And Naomi Campbell is not attractive to me b/c of her nasty attitude and crazy violent behavior. She is an embarrassment to Black women no matter how physically attractive she may be.

      There simply isn’t enough balance with the images of Black women. It wouldn’t be so bad if Black women had various images to counteract the bad ones. I’m not denying there aren’t many fat and ghetto acting Black women but when that is ALL we see in the media then its obvious they are trying to plant seeds in the eyes and minds of White men and other races of men to not see Black women as viable attractive partners.

      Funny you mention Michelle Obama (whom i love). It seems since she has been in the spotlight the media has been in full mode putting more and more negative images of Black women out there. Its like they do not want Black women looking at Michelle O and trying to copy her style and grace.

      Also, look at the amount of HATE Michelle receives in general compared to other first ladies. People are constantly ragging on her and she is not even ghetto, tacky or classless. She is a refined educated tall and slender Black woman and she sill doesn’t even get any respect.

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  3. Andrew Medina
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 07:08:08

    Neecy, you’re not paranoid. The SWPL suburban poor women really do see YOU as a threat. You have to realize that most media is meant for them. People who have nothing better to do than spend all their husband’s money, be irrational (and racist) and get fat. The sensible, attractive, college educated black woman is a threat to their supply of easily cowed white men (and their money).

    In my experience the worst cases of racist and leech behavior come from these disgusting human beings. That’s why I, as a Latino/White guy, refuse to date them.

    I’ve dated a black girl before, and I may be dating one in the near future (if she can work on that whole clingy thing. I can’t stand clingy).

    Another point which sounds like crazy conspiracy theory but White Progressive America has this desperate need to keep a permanent victim class going amongst blacks so that they can help them, and thus satiate their own Progressive neurosis. Just look at the progressive news channels vs. the conservative one (Fox). Who has more ATTRACTIVE, INTELLIGENT black females on the screen? I see plenty on Fox News and Fox News Business.

    So yes, I find black women attractive in the short term and long term sense. Then again the only thing my TV does is play video games.

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    • Zorro
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 08:19:38

      Well said! I worked in a hospital years ago and alongside a black woman who was one of the nicest, sweetest women I have ever known. And she was hotness! White chicks (especially the Jewish ones) are so full of themselves, they end up with a case of Princess Entitlement Complex that could knock a buzzard off a shit pile at 200 yards in high wind at midnight.

      I am soooooo tired of white women.

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 10:28:00

      The SWPL suburban poor women really do see YOU as a threat. You have to realize that most media is meant for them. People who have nothing better to do than spend all their husband’s money, be irrational (and racist) and get fat. The sensible, attractive, college educated black woman is a threat to their supply of easily cowed white men (and their money).

      Andrew this right here is the underlying foundation and has always been for why American Black women are constantly shown as the most repulsive women on earth. I’m not saying Black women don’t act like this in real life or that there aren’t a boat load of overweight obese Black women in America. But better believe there are just as many FAT White and Hispanic women as well. But they get better images in the media despite this obvious reality.

      Based on the media you would think that most or all White women were slim attractive ad beautiful and feminine. But the reality is many American White women (just like Black ) are fat and masculine acting. But it seems they only want people to see this from Black women. White women would NEVER encourage or place the most grotesque images of themselves in movies or magazines or TV shows like they do of Black women.

      Look at TV shows like GLEE. The ONLY fat unattractive chick on there is a Black girl. The rest of the Non black women on there are all slim and very attractive. They even have this poor Black girl so delusional about her figure. She was quoted in a magazine (with tons of White women responding with “YOU GO GIRL!”) saying how she is happy with her body and how she just “looooves her curves”. Clearly this girl is OBESE and not curvy. But this is the kind of nonsense Liberal White American women and gay White men are pushing to Black women.

      And the bottom line is – as you said, they don’t want to even think of a Black woman competing with them for White male resources and the benefits his power brings. The best most covert way to do this is force feed the most unappealing images of Black women. And we all know for the most part attractive available White males typically don’t find Fat women attractive. Funny how coincidently mostly all of the Black women we see more in the media are all FAT. Its always been this way since Black women were on television. Hattie McDaniel was the very first image of this.

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 10:42:08

      Another point which sounds like crazy conspiracy theory but White Progressive America has this desperate need to keep a permanent victim class going amongst blacks so that they can help them, and thus satiate their own Progressive neurosis. Just look at the progressive news channels vs. the conservative one (Fox). Who has more ATTRACTIVE, INTELLIGENT black females on the screen? I see plenty on Fox News and Fox News Business.

      No you are not crazy. In fact I am glad you brought up this point regarding conservative vs. liberal Whites. My grandmother looks at Fox news and you are right. There are always attractive intelligent Black women on there. One has her own show (can’t remember her name now but its like a boy name). She is very pretty and well-spoken and smart.

      Many intelligent Black women are finding that liberal Whites are the biggest perpetuators of this. As you said, they need victims to “save”. Most of the media are liberals. The same goes for Feminist White women who are also typically liberals. They support and uphold the worse most destructive behaviors of Black Americans – and will even make excuses for it.

      Many educated Black women who are Progressive (not in the liberal sense) are opening their eyes to see that liberalism is a joke and further pushes Black Americans deeper into the hole by enabling – usually at the unfortunate expense of Black women. Liberals use Black women as their stepping stool and HELP for all their causes. They also stick up and support criminalized Black male behavior. Liberalism also seeks to keep Black women in victimhood status by having programs that support and enable irresponsible parenting and having out of wedlock children.
      I find more liberal White to be the biggest racists many times. Also, a lot of the Black women I know who date interracially typically date conservative White males for some reason.

      Notice how Black women are shamed and shunned if they even show signs of conservatism or anything away from the “Black norm”. Black people just vote liberal b/c they have been TOLD to for decades. They don’t stop to really think how liberalism doesn’t and hasn’t helped Blacks progress very much. More Black American women are waking up and realizing the liberalism is not what its all cracked up to be – especially since it seeks to USE Black women for its causes while not returning the favor.

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  4. Liza207
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 09:13:49

    Neecy! You pretty much hit all bases on this topic. Of course, there is a conspiracy to keep certain black women down. I have experience most of my adult life from college to the workplace.

    “WHY OH WHY Does America insist on these images of Black American Women?”

    It makes white (women) America feels comfortable. Mammy is a pop culture fantasy – dreamed up and conceived by white women. She will help them solve their problems, take care of their children, she should never be attractive enough to distract any attention away from them, she will sacrifice her own happiness and even life to make sure that they are happy and she will not expect reciprocity for her efforts and nor will she get any. This is why white women you know and random white women are always so quick to start telling black women all their problems within 5 minutes of meeting you. Most of them have the mammy fantasy going in their heads and it does not matter how attractive you are or educated you are in comparison to them you are rarely viewed as their equals. I have had ww friends who I knew I was far more attractive and accomplished than but in their minds since I was not, white I was no competition for them until I was. They wanted a mammy but I don’t do mammy and I do not look like one either.

    She is a very well established, well spoken, THIN, ATTRACTIVE Black actress & spokesperson whom seemed to do quite well representing Black women on this show. While I have only caught glimpse of the show here and there, the times I did, I was very much impressed with Holly and how she represented herself.

    I have always been a fan of Holly Robin Peete since she was on 21 Jump Street and she looks amazing with each passing year. She definitely represents herself and black women well.

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 10:57:43

      This is why white women you know and random white women are always so quick to start telling black women all their problems within 5 minutes of meeting you.

      So true. They also look to Black women to fight their battles and play Cap’n Save a Ho to them in the workplace and elsewhere. I can’t tell you how many instances White women at work have tried to pull me into their issues or to fight their battles while they sit and cry and gain all the sympathy of the White men around. I refuse to play that game. And they also try to use the bad images of Black women to their advantage by making Black women out to be the troublemakers and shit starters in everything.

      Suddenly, they start crying when a White man is around. Guess what I do? I start crying and playing the damsel in distress too! They hate that. LOL They expect Black women to act all masculine and manly so that the men will not come to their rescue. LOL I simply nicely tell them I wish them luck at handling whatever it is that is bothering them. Black men do this too. They expect Black women to come to the rescues and fight their battles for them. What the heck is wrong with some Black men and White women! LOL

      I will never forget myself and a very attractive White female co-worker were travelling from a business trip back home. The plane had changed gates at the last minute and everyone on the flight had a mad rush across the airport to the new gate. So once we got on the plane we had two other White females sitting in the row in front of us.

      Everyone was trying to get their stuff in the bins above. So my friend/coworker started placing her stuff in the bin over the row in front of us and the other White girl was also trying to put her stuff in there too. So they playfully started arguing in a joking matter and at one point my coworker says to the other girl “we can take this outside if you want!”. So everyone on the plane starts laughing. Then the White girl she was arguing with looks over at me and goes “oh I am not worried SHE *pointing to me* has my back”. And I go “oh no sweetheart I don’t have anyone’s back, I’m a lover not a fighter!” And everyone starts laughing. But see the audacity to even suggest I, THE BLACK GIRL was going to fight her battles? Why didn’t she point out her other friend with her to have her back???

      This happens so much its not even funny. Its like we are here to be their protectors, shoulders to lean and cry on. Yet what do we get in return? NADA.

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  5. Liza207
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 09:19:29

    “How did they go from Peete to Underwood and what was the decisioning process behind it? Oooooh THE VIEW has Sherry Shephard”

    It is ashamed she got canned from the “The Talk” and will be replaced by Sheryl Underwood. Underwood represents exactly what they prefer to see on TV as representation of bw. She will on there to coon it up for them because America just loves the “sassy black women” and sell-out bw like Understood just giving what they want with absolutely no consideration to damage she doing to bw as a collective. SMDH.

    In addition, Sherry Sheppard makes me sick just the sound of her voice and her awful diction sickens me.

    “If they wanted a Black female comedian to replace Holly, shouldn’t they have chosen someone like Aisha Tyler who’s funny as HAIL and THIN and BEAUTIFUL?”

    I really like Aisha, always have I wish she was on TV more and she is very funny –the sarcastic, smart-ass. She is currently doing voice-over for the animated comedy series “Archer” but she should be seen – she is gorgeous and smart.

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:08:22

      Sheryl Underwood is UTTERLY DISGUSTING. She is crude, and nasty and vulgar. Who the heck even knows who she is? It was like they purposely put out a search for this woman. I can almost bet some idiot Black woman had her hand in this as well. You know the typical Black women who are moe than happy to contribute to their own demise. UGH!

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  6. Liza207
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 09:25:48

    “It seems American White and Non Black women feel most comfy seeing the asexual mammy like images of Black women in the media- and for good reason – LESS COMPETITION. But I do wonder if the intended beneficiaries (Non Black men) do buy into these images.”

    They are extremely comfortable with this image of us and in real life; it is even more frightening for them. I am not going to get into full detail here but over a year ago, I had to file a harassment claim against my white and Hispanic female coworkers. None of them denied any of my accusations against them either and none of them could give a real reason for their horrible racist behavior towards me– I was never nasty or confrontational. Therefore, it is not all in our heads.

    “The constant focus on the most non feminine types of Black women in media is to send signals that Black women are not to be seen as attractive and most of all as potential lovers, g/f’s and most of all WIVES. I do wonder if the media is winning.”

    Unfortunately, Neecy, it has gotten to the point of ridiculousness and they cannot deny it anymore because it has become excessively obvious. As I mentioned, black men now have much better representations of the image at this time. They even have spokespersons that are waiting in the wings to come in and shut anyone down who tries to fuck with their image. When are we going to follow suit?

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:15:50

      Liza,

      You are not the only Black woman who has experiences this in the workplace. if you are attractive and (GOD FORBID) THIN, you are going to catch it! Luckily I have been surrounded by cool and decent White women in my current position and I really like them. But in past positions there have been some unfortunate situations I have experienced first hand and seen my friends go through.

      I will never forget one of my past friends/ co workers who is gorgeous, feminine and thin in pharma had some FAT obese White woman office manager ask her “what her ethnicity was” and when she replied “BLACK” she responded with “since when did Black people start becoming attractive”. This was a result of my friend being tall and thin and receiving a lot of positive reinforcement and attention from the other attractive White male reps and docs in that particular office. She wanted to take my friend down a notch by saying that horrible racist thing to her by setting it up as flattery.

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      • Liza207
        Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:41:31

        To be so bold as to say this to a black woman’s face. Some of the most racist behavior and comments I’ve ever encounted and received have come from WW, hands down. But somehow they are seen as these perfect little liberal angels and everyone wants to protect them. It’s ridiculous.

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  7. Liza207
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 09:31:52

    “Another effect of this is indoctrinated Black women start believing in these images and focus on upholding them in real life. You have many Black American women who do really believe that fatness is beautiful, and crude, masculine , overly sexual behavior is ACCEPTABLE, and even attractive.”

    Black women have always believed in these images. You only have to look at the black women you encounter in real life to see that a lot of us are complicit and quite ready to uphold those negative images. Being told that you are acting like a white girl because you watch what you eat and go the gym on a regular basis or if you don’t have children out-of wedlock, so you are not a real bw or if you’re not loud and obnoxious you’re not really representing an authentic bw or speak Ebonics you’re not keeping it real. We have been helping them dig this hole for us from the beginning and we are partly to blame because we have been too slow on the uptake to put an end to them. Moreover, matter how bad it gets we continue to bury our heads in the sand.

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  8. Liza207
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 09:32:26

    “I find America is obsessed with the fat Black non-threatening asexual masculinized Black female or the overly sexualized Black woman. There is no happy medium Black girl ever shown. We are identified to be either on one end of the spectrum. If you are a Black woman who isn’t, you are kinda stuck wondering where you fit in in this world and society.”

    America is definitely obsessed with this image. Why do you think Oprah is so popular with white women? She is their fantasy ideal of the American black woman – the Mammy personified, coming to their rescue to save them and make them better about themselves and lives. I remember on one of her shows when was thanking the man (white) who gave her the show. She said to him with tears in her eyes, “I never thought a black woman who looks like me would have her own show on national TV”. I was like how clueless is this woman? How is she not seeing that one of the reasons she has the show is because of the way she looks? I think she is very good at what she does and is obviously very smart but she definitely does not have a clue about where she fits into agenda to destroy the image of BW. It is sad really but at least she pimped the image and made a shit load of money doing so.

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  9. Marellus
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 09:47:04

    @ Ummm Liza, next time you say something don’t beat around the bush. You tell it straight. You say what you wanna say. We can take it. So stop being so diplomatic !!!! 🙂 😉 🙂

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:28:32

      LOL! Sorry marellus but we have just had it up to our foreheads with this stuff. These images have GREATLY affected Black women negativley in our day to day lives. If we don’t talk about it and bring it to light it will never change.

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    • Liza207
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:49:45

      Marellus, so my comments were a little too in your face, huh. LOL! But Neecy like said, these things as unpleasant as they are have to be disgusted and dealt with in order for them to change. I have always been the kind of person who judges people as individuals and when someone is judging you based on something you can’t control (race) it can be very dishardening.

      American does has a way to go in terms of how we relate to each other racially.

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      • Neecy
        Sep 12, 2011 @ 12:09:31

        I have always been the kind of person who judges people as individuals and when someone is judging you based on something you can’t control (race) it can be very dishardening.

        YES. It seems all other races of women get the luxury of being judged individually, while Black women are judged collectivley. I work hard at seeing people as individuals FIRST and the same should be extended to Black women – which often times not the case. Black women are such easy targets b/c we don’t have the same protection that other races of men and people give to their women. We are just kinda left out as prey for anyone to target. That is why we have to start speaking up as women to change this.

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        • Marellus
          Sep 12, 2011 @ 15:00:32

          @Liza @Neecy

          If what you are saying is true, then there is nothing that you can do via the media, nor by government to change this.

          The root of racism is white women fearing black men.

          “In my daily life there’s no one else that I feel threatened by except black people. If a courier comes to my door and he’s white, coloured or Indian, I’d have no problem inviting him in for a glass of water. But I would feel ­threatened by a black man.” Botes said she would also never appoint a black gardener.

          And most of these women become mothers.

          The only way that the Black Man in America will garner any respect is by congregating in a specific area, establish an absolute local majority, establish an autonomous self-sustaining economy, establish a transparent government, establish a responsible government, and ultimately secede from the USA.

          And should the Black Man do this, to not bugger up, then go blame someone else, and then demand a handout. This is what happened with Liberia.

          As William Raspberry said :

          There is another minority whose situation may be more instructive. I refer to the Asian-Americans. Neither the newly arrived South-East Asians, nor the earlier arriving Japanese-Americans, Chinese-Americans, and Korean-Americans are loved by white people. But these groups have spent little time and energy proving that white people don’t love them.

          While our myth is that racism accounts for our shortcomings, their belief is that their own efforts can make the difference, no matter what white people think

          And now the question is why an abrasive and unattractive Black Woman has hit the big time at the expense of a woman more beautiful and feminine.

          Maybe it is because these types of women are so common in the ghettos as portrayed by Precious’ overweight, alcoholic, abusive, sexually frustrated, manipulative, welfare dependent and violent mother.

          And Precious got out, as did these women you’re railing against. And that makes these women an object of curiosity.

          I say kudos to them.

          And I’d like to know why this is possible.

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          • Neecy
            Sep 12, 2011 @ 16:48:39

            If what you are saying is true, then there is nothing that you can do via the media, nor by government to change this….. then go blame someone else, and then demand a handout. This is what happened with Liberia. ……While our myth is that racism accounts for our shortcomings, their belief is that their own efforts can make the difference, no matter what white people think

            I know what you are getting at here wihtout really saying. But I wholeheartedly agree with this premise. Black women need to stop seeking support and validation from people (this includes not just Whites, but Black men and Black people too) who have shown ZERO interest in supporting and working with us – while taking all they can from what we have to offer for them. BW need to start making their own ways to get what we need as women. And for those who do not recirpocate they should not receive our money, time, resources or support. That is why i turn off the TV and keep my money in my wallet for movies and things that i feel don’t move the images of Black women forward.

            I agree that its not White women, White men, Black men or anyone else’s job to improve the images of Black American women. Black American women need to work very hard at doing this OURSELVES. And the start is pointing out part of the problem – social media and its attempts at marginalizing American Black women for their sole benefits.

            Black women are the only ones who CAN change this. Its been this way since the beginning. Black women’s womanhood in America has always been defined and portrayed by everyone BUT US. We have allowed our images to be the sole property of everyone else (who doesn’t have our best interest). And we suffer the greatest for it. Black women now have power to change these images IF WE CHOOSE and wake up to what is really going on.

            Personally I have no desire to change mainstream media. What I have a problem with is, Black women need to stop dealing with people and things that are not reciprocating. American Black women are known for being all giving with no expectations for reciprocation. That is not healthy and all it does is allow everyone to walk over and use us for their own gains.

            Black women need to create their own media outlets FOR US where we tell our stories the way we want to, where we redefine ourselves as women etc. So this is not about forcing Mainstream media to change. This is about Black women waking up to the reality that we cannot and should not depend on others to protect and uplift our image. ONLY we can do that and we need to start making it happen.

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          • Neecy
            Sep 12, 2011 @ 16:58:09

            And now the question is why an abrasive and unattractive Black Woman has hit the big time at the expense of a woman more beautiful and feminine.

            Maybe it is because these types of women are so common in the ghettos as portrayed by Precious’ overweight, alcoholic, abusive, sexually frustrated, manipulative, welfare dependent and violent mother.

            And Precious got out, as did these women you’re railing against. And that makes these women an object of curiosity.

            I say kudos to them.

            And I’d like to know why this is possible.

            I’m sure it may be of curiosity to some White people but its getting to the point where it seems these are the only stories about Black women that Black men, Whites and others are interested in – WHY? If every image you saw of yourself as a White male was that of being evil dictators, racists etc., and that is all Black people wanted to promote and see of you wouldn’t you become suspicious as to why these are the only images of White men KNOWING there are millions of other White men on earth who don’t fit those stereotypes? And wouldn’t you try to do something to change it?

            The media is very powerful. It has and does INFLUENCE perceptions and behaviors towards many things, people and places. How many times have I heard or read some man say “I am not attracted to Black women they are too masculine acting and too fat”. I believe people underestimate the power of social media.

            There are millions of Black women in America and we all are not born in poverty, struggling, living ghetto depressive lives like Precious. THAT is the problem. America seems to only want to feed off the BAD depressive lifestyles and images s of Black women. Why no balance? There are plenty of middle ground Black women who have normal, healthy upbringings and lives. We are happy women who are not always struggling.

            I personally feel that people love looking at others and zeroing in on their struggles to make their lives and themselves feel better. As long as Black women are portrayed as constantly struggling, poverty stricken, fat, masculine, depressive people will eventually start believing this to be of Black women. And worse, BLACK WOMEN start believing this is their sole purpose and plight in life. They start believing its okay to struggle, be masculine and fat.

            Indoctrination is a powerful tool and thing and can destroy a person, thing or group of people if done enough. I as a Black woman will try my best to open the eyes of the masses of Black women buying into this unfortunate propaganda about us. And I will do it not by begging mainstream media to show better images of Black women, but doing it MYSELF.

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            • Marellus
              Sep 12, 2011 @ 17:35:11

              Well said.

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            • Liza207
              Sep 12, 2011 @ 19:59:40

              Yeah, Neecy, it’s solely on us to change our image because no one else really gives a damn. It really pisses me that there are so many black women that are so unaware (or they appear to) and are willing sell us all out for fame or to get recognition. They are the true sell-outs.

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              • Neecy
                Sep 12, 2011 @ 21:18:02

                The thing is we cannot focus on the zombies. Only the Black women who get it. Hopefully & eventually the zombies will see there is a different way to be and accept themselves as Black women that don’t have to be the defintions that everyone else places on us as women.

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  10. Firepower
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 11:54:16

    im not too proud to declare i’d do the mogambo with Aisha Tyler until i craved chikn n’ waffles.

    HEY, all the white msm movie critics just loved Precious. Still, you black girls still have Madea

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 12:04:50

      tsk tsk tsk FP. I don’t think Stacey Dash would like you cheating on her with Aisha???

      OH GAWD! How could I forget MADEA. Triple UGH! Yeah they loooved Precious alright. There seems to be this love for seeing Black women in depressing roles in which her life is a downward spiral.

      RE: Chicken and Waffles. Oh please FP! There are more Whites, Asians and Hispanics in the Chicken N Waffles joint than Black folks. LOL!

      Can’t put that stereotype on us annnnymore.

      Stick around i wll eventually be creating small short films and skits with HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY Prrrrreeeeettty Black girls – and yes they will have NON Black lovers, b/f’s and hubbies too 😀

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      • Firepower
        Sep 12, 2011 @ 12:27:07

        Neecy

        tsk tsk tsk FP. I don’t think Stacey Dash would like you cheating on her with Aisha???

        o NOE you di-int!
        so after all the civil rights stuff, i only get one black girl.for my quota no fair

        RE: Chicken and Waffles. Oh please FP! There are more Whites, Asians and Hispanics in the Chicken N Waffles joint than Black folks. LOL!

        Can’t put that stereotype on us annnnymore.

        your crazy: i love chikn n’ waffles. its tasty, sweet, sticky and satisfying. often, i want to roll over an go to sleep after having it

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        • Neecy
          Sep 12, 2011 @ 16:21:07

          so after all the civil rights stuff, i only get one black girl.for my quota no fair

          YES. Choose wisely my dear. LOL

          your crazy: i love chikn n’ waffles. its tasty, sweet, sticky and satisfying. often, i want to roll over an go to sleep after having it

          Yes that is the intended effect.

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  11. Neecy
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 19:41:30

    OH Zorro the time is nearing! Let the countdown beginnnnn! 3,….

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    • Zorro
      Sep 13, 2011 @ 07:13:48

      Yes. I just got home from an overnight camping trip with one of my brothers. Huge bonfire, massive beer drinking and the usual man-in-the-wilderness stuff.

      There were moose tracks in the sand where we put our tent. It brought a tear to my eyes.

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      • Neecy
        Sep 13, 2011 @ 13:08:37

        oooh a man in the wild taking on natures furry beasts. SEXAY!! So do you have any special plans for your bday tommorow?

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  12. Mark Slater
    Sep 12, 2011 @ 20:12:01

    Ahh, what refreshing, heartfelt candor. THIS is why I come to the Nest!

    Some observations:
    “I don’t even watch Television anymore. And the minute I start saying to myself “turn on the tube” I am reminded each time why its not worth my sanity.”

    I have found that that which comes out of the television is, in the main, garbage. I could no longer justify increasing cable bills for just a handful of intelligent, enjoyable shows; so I cancelled my cable. As my T.V. didn’t pick up network (digital) signals, it went out as well. As someone raised on television, I was concerned, but it has worked out well so far. (Except right now, as the Raiders are playing my beloved Denver Broncos)

    “In fact I am glad you brought up this point regarding conservative vs. liberal Whites. My grandmother looks at Fox news and you are right.”

    I am glad that Black people of a more thoughtful nature are coming to understand that White Confederate flag-waving Southerners, Conservative Christians, and the like, are not your enemy. Seems like your main detractors are in the programming offices of the mainstream media.

    “The fact is she is a bad representation for Black American women on *ANY* talk show”
    I have not, until now, noticed that the ideal Black Woman of the mainstream media is the brusque, loud, pushy fat type. Now that you mention it, I *can* see how an elegant, classy, Black woman may find that unjust.

    Perhaps you may use that to show the world what you are NOT. That tall, handsome White cowboy may say, “Golly, Miss Neecy, you ain’t like them there Black gals I see on T.V. at all!”

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    • Neecy
      Sep 12, 2011 @ 21:28:46

      😀

      Yes Mark I just don’t watch TV enough to justify a cable bill, but sometimes I might plop down and watch an interesting show or funny movie. For the most part I don’t watch it. I may turn it on for background noise on occassion.

      I am glad that Black people of a more thoughtful nature are coming to understand that White Confederate flag-waving Southerners, Conservative Christians, and the like, are not your enemy. Seems like your main detractors are in the programming offices of the mainstream media.

      Oh there are still quite a bit of us with our heads buried in the sand. It seems Black people today don’t want to get a mind of their own and use common sense. Its so easy to follow old, outdated ideas and blueprints as Black people in America. The fact is liberals seem to believe they are so progressive that they cannot hold any prejudiced ideas or racist ideas. That is faaaar from the truth.

      Perhaps you may use that to show the world what you are NOT. That tall, handsome White cowboy may say, “Golly, Miss Neecy, you ain’t like them there Black gals I see on T.V. at all!”

      LOL All I want is for people to see me as an individual FIRST and not a collective of my race/gender.

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    • Neecy
      Sep 13, 2011 @ 05:10:42

      Oh and plz direct me to where all the tall handsome white cowboys are. Surely they are not hanging around in L.A. lol

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  13. Neecy
    Sep 14, 2011 @ 18:16:01

    LOL @ the superskinny posts

    FP said:

    *sigh* i knew all along you couldnt cook c&w
    i am SO done with you now

    If those gals really loved you, they’d make you a healthy egg white omelette with veggies & salsa on the side!

    @ LIZA

    I know 2 1/2 hours! that’s a moose with a whole lotta juice LOL.

    @ Zorro

    Ahem, can you please inform us of what Moose Meat tastes like? I’ve tasted pork and beef but no moose. LOL

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    • Zorro
      Sep 14, 2011 @ 22:34:08

      What “moose meat” tastes like is something I can’t possibly describe because I am not a GAY MOOSE.

      Seriously. I just don’t want to go there.

      There are more than a few cow moosies who have feasted on Zorro’s moose meat, and the repast was splendiforous, judging by their reactions. Being a gentleman moose, I reciprocated the courtesy (with the help of more than a little pineapple), but beyond that, I cannot say.

      I am not a moose who kisses and tells. Zorro has his ethics, and he will not trespass against them.

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  14. Name Withheld
    Jan 04, 2013 @ 02:42:15

    Oh, my! I recently forged this discussion with a group of friends. I mentioned the girl from “Glee”, Sherrie Shepherd and a few others you’ve listed. Oprah reigns supreme of all unattractive, overweight African-American women in mainstream media. I, too, believe it’s done purposely, as a subliminal message of sorts to brainwash the masses into believing black women are aesthetically sub-standard to women of other races. When have you seen black actresses routinely described as beautiful or gorgeous (besides Halle Berry)? The media calls nearly every white woman beautiful and the public buys into it.

    Cameron Diaz isn’t pretty, neither is Jennifer Aniston. I could go on and on. Kim Kardashian has an ugly shape. No joke! Look at it. Her waist is wide, torso is long, legs are short and her butt looks plain weird. Speaking of backsides, why are voluptuous bottoms only raved about in mainstream media when the butt is attached to a non-black woman? Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Biel aren’t the first women to have booties. Black celebrities with nice figures are never praised for their curves nor have they garnered fame simply for having a nice figure. These images and messages are so bias that children are programmed to believe white women are better…prettier. They even forced the untruth that most black men prefer white women. They don’t. Most black athletes aren’t married to non-black women and all black wives of athletes don’t behave like those fools on the reality shows.

    Back to “O”, notice how Oprah’s core audience is comprised of predominately white women. I’ve always wondered if they would have embraced her in the package of Michelle Obama. Yes, Oprah is fairly intelligent, but she definitely isn’t winning any beauty contests. She has slimmed down from time to time, but never maintained a healthy weight and even openly admitted to having a weight “problem” all her life. They love her for that!

    As a 5’9″ physically appealing, intelligent dark-skinned black woman with near waist length REAL hair, I feel that people try to force their stereotypical ideals onto me as my reality. They want me to be loud and easily angered. They want me to be inarticulate and crass. They want me to believe the notion that my darker skin makes me less attractive. They want my long hair to be fake. Not going to happen here, but it’s a constant fight to be seen as real and authentic. How could I exist, right? Well, there are millions just like me. Look around you. 🙂

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  15. Delphi
    Mar 15, 2015 @ 18:20:55

    Ok – so I’m a white woman and I sorta happened upon your page incidentally as I was looking for tall, thin, curvy women whom I could emulate, fashion-wise. Anyways, I saw the pic of Aisha Taylor and thought to myself “oh I remember her! She was always cool – let me check this out” and low and behold, by clicking on the pic I came to your blog. I’m kinda laughing as I read it, because I totally see what you mean. But I just wanted to say that not all white women fear attractive black women, or feel intimidated by them. I work with a black woman who’s a Neurologist, PhD, and ex-model – talk about intimidating! But not because she’s black! Anyway, I guess my point is – not all white women are looking for annoying women (black or white) to have host TV shows or be on TV. I found Precious to suck, and you couldn’t force me to sit through that dreck of “The Help.” So I feel your pain. And I know there is a lot of CRAP out there that you have to deal with. But I also just wanted to get my voice out there. Now, is there some weird conspiracy in Hollywood to push a certain “image” among black women? I really don’t know. But I do see your point. And I can imagine it’s totally annoying. Anyway, thanks for being honest and it’s refreshing to see someone’s point of view whom I agree with. Cheers,
    Delph

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